Much Work; Some Chess, and the phantom Queen on g2 checkmate
It's been a few days since I have posted anything. Probably cuz we've been so busy sorting out the capital in the Terminal, archiving the discussions, and archving them at TQaRchives, the sister blog to this one.
The enmity of last week's meeting is far, far behind us. Hal 3000 (H3K) and Guy LaFloor have renewed my faith in this whole crazy venture, with the seminal work they have done. Concerning the In Bloom disagreement twixt those two, and, I need to mention, Pinckney Guevara. LaFloor was so vociferously 'For' In Bloom making it out of the Terminal "Alive" that Guevara wagered the piece's death or survival upon a chess game engaged in in the Conference Room.
The match went down Friday, December 16, 2005. It lasted 4 hours and ended in controversy. Guevara's queen, ostensibly on square g3 was integral in the final checkmate of LaFloor's king on e3, as facilited by a Knight moved a1-c2. Much gloating ensued by Guevara, when Hal 3000, refereeing the match, informed Guevara his Queen was not on square g2, but h2. By then, however, LaFloor had departed in disgrace, thinking In Bloom had met it's sorry fate.
Upon inspection of the transcript, Guevara conceded that his Queen -- having checkmated LaFloor's king by moving her h2-e2 -- but LaFloor's preceding pawn move had been illegal and had been commanded by the referee to move back to it's originating square at a5 and move again. Guevara, in his excitement had not noticed LaFloor's illegal pawn move, and had moved Queen h2-e2 checkmate and it took some time to where H3K and LaFloor could make him understand he needed to re-set that queen and allow white (LaFloor) to re-do that offending pawn move. Guevara re-set to g2 then, instead of h2, thereby laying the disastrous end game checkmate that wasn't.
However, in Guevara's defense, LaFloor was stripped to a King and two pawns, while he had for pawns, 2 rooks and his queen still actively pursuing LaFloor's king on the board. Surely, victory was inevitable. Leaving In Bloom's sad fate sealed.
However, Guevara's error can not be glossed over, thereby giving In Bloom (and LaFloor) victory, and life by technicality.
Transcript of match follows:
[22:54 lafloor] Dono: No, I'm supposed to get the KING!
[22:55 lafloor] Hal, Dono is the writer of the capital in question tonight
[22:55 H3K] Ah.. pleased to meet you
[22:55 lafloor] I am going to ICE Guevara in this game so that in Bloom can move on, and Dono will witness it!
[22:55 Dono] lafloor: Hi H3K
[22:55 Dono] lafloor: So how does this work?
[22:56 H3K] going outside for a quick smoke before the match commences. brb
[22:56 lafloor] I guess once Guevara show up we'll just list our moves
[22:56 lafloor] okay Hal
[22:56 lafloor] And as we list our moves, we each have a chessboard in front of us
[22:56 lafloor] so we can follow the game
[22:57 lafloor] I bought a chessboard today to do this!
[22:57 lafloor] It's cheap and cardboard.
[22:57 lafloor] but I also watched Searching for Bobby Fisher
[22:57 Dono] lafloor: HA! I was just going to ask.
[22:57 lafloor] so I think I have a clear advantage now
[22:57 lafloor] really, though, don't get your hopes up.
[22:57 lafloor] From what I glean, Guevara knows how to play
[22:58 lafloor] And I'm still reading directions
[22:58 Dono] lafloor: i think the faster you move the better
[22:58 lafloor] Are you serious?
[22:58 Dono] lafloor: gives the other guy less time to plan
[22:58 lafloor] I have to move fast?
[22:58 lafloor] Oh jesus
[22:58 lafloor] Alright, I'll try to move fast
[22:58 guevara] Hola!
[22:58 lafloor] Guevara!
[22:58 Dono] lafloor: its called the hit and run method
[22:58 lafloor] Bonjour!
[22:59 lafloor] You ready to to eat puck, Guevara?
[22:59 guevara] I will be black. I concede to the hockey goon the first move
[22:59 guevara] Mr. Capone, my condolences.
[23:00 lafloor] That's mighty kind of you, Guevara.
[23:00 Dono] lafloor: making it up
[23:00 lafloor] Gentlemanly, even
[23:00 guevara] I am, yes.
[23:00 lafloor] Dono: And I was going to try and do it!! Don't screw with me like that!
[23:00 Dono] lafloor: but it is my theory on why newbies beat real chessplayers sometimes
[23:00 guevara] No need to gloat before I mop floor with Canadian?
[23:01 lafloor] Dono: I will try it then
[23:01 guevara] Or should I say mop La Floor?
[23:01 lafloor] Yes, G, I would like to get some pre-gloating in if that's allowed!
[23:01 lafloor] You're so punny, Guevara!
[23:01 guevara] Please, do your worst.
[23:01 lafloor] I'm going to skate all over your greek salad ass!
[23:01 guevara] Is that all you have got?
[23:01 lafloor] And then enjoy roast beef with everyone on the floor
[23:02 guevara] My chessboard gently weeps.
[23:02 lafloor] My chessboard is only 5 inches big
[23:02 guevara] Move, at your peril.
[23:02 lafloor] Don't let that intimidate you though
[23:02 guevara] It sounds like a personal problem to me.
[23:02 lafloor] Do we need to wait for Hal?
[23:02 lafloor] He's having a quick smoke
[23:02 H3K] *ahem*
[23:02 lafloor] Or should we start anyhow?
[23:02 lafloor] He's having a quick smoke
[23:02 H3K] *ahem*
[23:02 lafloor] Or should we start anyhow?
[23:03 guevara] Hal is up on my screen.
[23:03 lafloor] Hal!
[23:03 H3K] Yes, you need to wait for me
[23:03 lafloor] Oh crap
[23:03 lafloor] Now I have to begin?
[23:03 H3K] Stand by while I set up the board
[23:03 guevara] No kidney punches.
[23:03 guevara] Standing by, Senor Machine.
[23:04 guevara] lafloor: I must break you.
[23:05 Dono] lafloor: I'll reimburse you for the board
[23:05 lafloor] Guevara -- let me make sure I have it right --
[23:05 guevara] lafloor: Jes?
[23:05 lafloor] My left hand rook is on space A1, right?
[23:05 guevara] lafloor: I have diagrams. Symbol charts, tarot cards, too.
[23:05 guevara] lafloor: Jes.
[23:06 lafloor] and your left hand rook is on space H8
[23:06 guevara] lafloor: Your Queen is also on your left hand side.
[23:06 lafloor] You may have props, but I have righteous indignance on my side!
[23:06 guevara] lafloor: Correct, my left hand rook is H*
[23:07 guevara] lafloor: Give me my props!
[23:07 lafloor] I can't tell the queen pieces from the king, so I put a dot of nail polish on them
[23:07 guevara] Dono: I must break you, too.
[23:07 lafloor] I may have a cross-dressing king, actually
[23:07 guevara] Your ingenuity is startling.
[23:07 Dono] lafloor: i'm in serious trouble here
[23:07 lafloor] Guevara, one more question --
[23:07 guevara] Were is the Machine?
[23:08 guevara] Jes.
[23:08 guevara] Go ahead.
[23:08 lafloor] What is your overall strategy and how can I easily diffuse it? Can you tell me that upfront, please?
[23:08 H3K] *ahem*
[23:09 lafloor] Hal is ready!
[23:09 lafloor] Oh crap
[23:09 guevara] To use my 4th language, German: Blitzkrieg!
[23:09 lafloor] I mean -- PREPARE TO SUFFER!
[23:09 H3K] As referee for this farce, I make the following official announcements:
[23:09 lafloor] Okay, here's my opening move --
[23:09 guevara] Vamos!
[23:09 guevara] Ahem.
[23:09 guevara] Rules first, Guy.
[23:09 H3K] (1) Be cautioned that I am not familiar with the so-called algebraic notation
[23:10 guevara] But you have the link, right?
[23:10 H3K] I am working with a crib sheet, as you undoubtedly are.
[23:10 guevara] Jes, Yo say.
[23:10 lafloor] I am working with a crib sheet, yes
[23:10 H3K] (2) This match shallbe played to checkmate. A resignation by one side is a win for the other.
[23:11 lafloor] Okay. What are the rules?
[23:11 guevara] Si, si.
[23:11 lafloor] Oui, Oui
[23:11 H3K] (3) In the event of a draw, the referee reserves the right to determine the disposition of the capital venture for which this game is being played.
[23:12 guevara] Si, it is agreed. Vamos!
[23:12 lafloor] Wait!
[23:12 H3K] The rules are the rules of the game of chess.
[23:12 lafloor] I'm not an idiot!
[23:12 lafloor] Most chess matches are draws!
[23:12 lafloor] That means I did all this for nothing!
[23:12 lafloor] Aren't most chess matches draws?
[23:12 H3K] I suspect that a draw is a very UNlikely event, so untwist your knickers, LaFloor.
[23:13 guevara] Si!
[23:13 Dono] lafloor: thats tic tac toe you're thinking of lafloor
[23:13 Dono] lafloor: thats tic tac toe you're thinking of lafloor
[23:13 guevara] I grow weary of your prattling and obfuscations.
[23:13 lafloor] Dono: I'm pretty good at tick tac toes
[23:13 guevara] Attendez vous!
[23:14 lafloor] Fine, I begin ...
[23:14 Dono] lafloor: is it too late to change the game?
[23:14 lafloor] Pawn H2 to H4
[23:14 H3K] The rules of engagement are as follows: white (LaFloor) moves first.
[23:14 guevara] ERm, French is my 3rd language.
[23:14 Dono] lafloor: tic tac toe
[23:14 H3K] There will be NO cross chatter by either player.
[23:14 guevara] Si. I give la floor to LaFloor.
[23:15 H3K] Comments by the specators will be kept to a minimum, please...
[23:15 H3K] Comments by the specators will be kept to a minimum, please...
[23:15 guevara] Si. Vamanos muchachos!
[23:15 lafloor] I don't understand the no cross chatter rule?
[23:15 H3K] The players will confine themselve to the notation of their moves.
[23:15 lafloor] Does that mean I ONLY speak my moves while playing?
[23:15 guevara] Si.
[23:15 lafloor] Oh
[23:15 lafloor] Okay
[23:15 H3K] I will not impose a time limit -- I do not have a stopwatch.
[23:16 guevara] Blitzkrieg!
[23:16 lafloor] So this is going to be a really FUN match then, huh?
[23:16 H3K] The referee also reserves the right to call timeouts during the game, as do both players.
[23:16 guevara] I must apologize in advance, senor Capone.
[23:16 guevara] I did enjoy los capital.
[23:16 lafloor] I must alos apologize, Mr. Capone
[23:16 guevara] But now...
[23:17 guevara] adios amigo!
[23:17 Dono] guevara: i have confidence in lafloor!
[23:17 Dono] guevara: i have confidence in lafloor!
[23:17 guevara] Shall we dance?
[23:17 H3K] Are the players ready?
[23:17 Dono] guevara: she has 2 queens!
[23:17 guevara] Confidence is a child's trinket, senor.
[23:17 guevara] To be crushed under the boot heel of opression!'
[23:18 guevara] Viva la revoluccione!
[23:18 lafloor] Je suis ready.
[23:18 H3K] I repeat, are the players ready?
[23:18 guevara] Or however that damn thing is spelt.
[23:18 Dono] lafloor: win one for the gipper, lafloor
[23:18 guevara] Si, senor!
[23:18 lafloor] Yeah, yeah, La dolce vita and all
[23:18 guevara] I stand naked before you.
[23:18 H3K] Then LET'S GET READY TO RUMMMMMBLE!!!!
[23:18 H3K] White (LaFloor) your move.
[23:19 guevara] Who let Michael Buffer in the Octagon!
[23:19 lafloor] I don't know, but he's good!
[23:19 lafloor] Oh. Okay. Here goes:
[23:19 lafloor] Pawn H2 to H4
[23:19 guevara] Si.
[23:19 Dono] lafloor: put some nirvana on and get pumped up!
[23:20 guevara] The French defense is in order I see.
[23:20 H3K] KRP - P4
[23:20 H3K] black?
[23:20 guevara] d2-d4
[23:20 lafloor] Dono: what the fuck is he talking about French defense? We're done!
[23:21 H3K] QP - P4
[23:21 guevara] I see you have a confederate in the audience. No coaching I say!
[23:21 H3K] stand by, please
[23:21 guevara] H3K, are you mad?
[23:21 Dono] lafloor:
[23:21 guevara] I mean, 'Insane'?
[23:22 lafloor] Guevara? Are YOU? *I'm* in the row 2
[23:22 H3K] sorry - Real Life intervened. Resume, please
[23:23 lafloor] I don't understand Guevara's move
[23:23 guevara] H3K, has moved for you?
[23:23 H3K] just play
[23:23 guevara] Oh, wait
[23:23 lafloor] d2-d4 would be MY pieces, I thought
[23:23 guevara] Pawn h2-h4
[23:23 guevara] that is my first move
[23:23 lafloor] He needs to make a move out of row 7 or 8, I thought
[23:23 guevara] Now, are we straight?
[23:23 H3K] Wait, please
[23:24 guevara] Oh yeah. Sorry!
[23:24 guevara] Pawn h7-h5
[23:24 lafloor] No, we are not straight. If you are playing black, you would be rows 7 and 8 right now, I think
[23:24 H3K] In algebraic notation, the designations do not change depending on the POV
[23:24 guevara] Pardon!
[23:24 guevara] I am a bit rattle by your hockey stick.
[23:25 guevara] Correct! My mistake. Forgive. Play on!
[23:25 lafloor] I understand the move now!
[23:25 H3K] black's first move is h7-h5 (KRP - R 4))
[23:25 lafloor] I have a very large and forceful stick, Guevara, it's understandable
[23:25 H3K] white?
[23:25 H3K] white?
[23:26 guevara] I was looking at my diagram upside down.
[23:26 lafloor] Pawn 2G - 3G
[23:26 Dono] lafloor: good move!
[23:26 guevara] I must use the Going After Cacciotto defense, methinks.
[23:26 lafloor] It's fine Guevara, I was just worried I was already totally confused
[23:26 Dono] lafloor: keep up the pressure!
[23:26 H3K] P - KN3
[23:26 H3K] black?
[23:26 guevara] Uno momento whilst I move your piece.
[23:27 guevara] d7-d5
[23:28 H3K] QP - Q4
[23:28 lafloor] knight 1B - 3C
[23:29 H3K] white?
[23:29 H3K] N - QB3
[23:29 H3K] black?
[23:29 guevara] I am responding sir,
[23:30 guevara] Bc1-f5
[23:31 guevara] Bc8-f5 I mean
[23:31 guevara] pardon.
[23:32 guevara] Hello?
[23:32 lafloor] pawn 2d - 3d
[23:33 H3K] black B - KB4
[23:33 H3K] white P - Q3
[23:33 H3K] black's move
[23:34 guevara] Nb8-c3
[23:34 guevara] Nb8-c6 I mean
[23:34 guevara] Damn me!
[23:34 H3K] N - QB3
[23:35 guevara] Nb8-C6 is the move sir. I am duly chastised.
[23:35 H3K] I understood... white?
[23:35 guevara] Correct.
[23:36 guevara] lafloor: I must break you.
[23:37 lafloor] knight 1g - 3f
[23:37 Dono] lafloor:
[23:37 lafloor] guevara: i must not be broken!
[23:37 H3K] N - KB3
[23:37 lafloor] guevara: i will not be broken!
[23:38 Dono] lafloor: give him hell, lafloor!
[23:38 guevara] Pawn e7-e6
[23:38 H3K] P- K3
[23:39 guevara] Santa Maria, I'm not gonna break!
[23:40 H3K] The players will confine their remarks to their moves, please...
[23:40 H3K] whit'es move
[23:40 guevara] Pardon.
[23:40 guevara] I mean, PardOne!
[23:41 lafloor] pawn 3d - 4d
[23:41 lafloor] guevara: got reprimanded by the ref! BA HA!
[23:41 H3K] P -Q4
[23:42 guevara] Bf8-cc5
[23:43 H3K] B - QB 4
[23:44 guevara] Hal, you are confusing me with these Queen's bishops
[23:44 guevara] I must protest!
[23:44 guevara] La nombres do not correspond.
[23:45 guevara] But I do understand you.
[23:45 H3K] c5 is your QB4 -- read the diagram
[23:45 Dono] lafloor: he's running scared, lafloor. move in for the kill!
[23:45 guevara] But cease, or I shall kill you.
[23:46 guevara] My petition has been thrown out!
[23:46 guevara] lafloor: My name is Pinckney Guevara.
[23:46 guevara] lafloor: Prepare to die.
[23:46 H3K] The players will confine their remarks to their moves, please...
[23:47 lafloor] pawn 4d - 5c (can I do that?)
[23:47 guevara] Pardone!
[23:47 lafloor] guevara: you got yelled at again!
[23:47 guevara] Oh shit!
[23:47 H3K] For the sake of the VC and his capital, you do not wish me to stop play.
[23:47 guevara] Jes. I am taken.
[23:47 lafloor] can id o that? Can I take that bishop?
[23:47 lafloor] BA HA HA HA!
[23:48 guevara] Alas, poor bishop.
[23:48 H3K] Yes, you can. White: PxB
[23:48 lafloor] Don!! Did you see that? I got his BISHOP!!
[23:48 guevara] I will avenge you!
[23:48 lafloor] Oh, I'm sorry. That taunting was meant to be private
[23:48 H3K] Play on -- black's move
[23:48 H3K] Play on -- black's move
[23:48 guevara] Ng8-h6
[23:49 lafloor] Oh. I fucked up. The bastard tricked me!
[23:49 Dono] lafloor:
[23:49 guevara] Oh shit!
[23:49 guevara] I mean, caca!
[23:49 lafloor] No he didnt'!
[23:49 guevara] Mui madre.
[23:50 H3K] N - KR3
[23:50 lafloor] you're going down, Guevara!!
[23:50 H3K] white's move
[23:50 guevara] I finish strong, senor.
[23:51 lafloor] I'll finish YOu!
[23:51 guevara] The world is waiting senor.
[23:51 lafloor] What are you doing, btw? Consulting Big Blue for your moves?
[23:51 H3K] A yellow card is issued to both players for un-chessmanlike conduct.
[23:51 Dono] lafloor:
[23:51 guevara] Vamos!
[23:51 H3K] STFU and play, please.
[23:52 lafloor] Dono: I think I need to develop my pawns
[23:52 lafloor] Dono: I'm not sure what that means, but I don't knw how to do it anyhow
[23:52 lafloor] Dono: You tell me when I should bring out the Qeen though
[23:52 H3K] Note to LaFloor -- those called private mesages are visible to me, if not also to Guevara
[23:53 guevara] Oh, give the queen to me!
[23:53 H3K] unless you check the little P
[23:53 guevara] No private messaging! I must protest!
[23:53 guevara] Scoundrels!
[23:53 H3K] Duly noted -- play on
[23:53 lafloor] Hal, I knew that. It's my intimidation method. DOn't tell Guevara though
[23:53 guevara] I demand back my bishop!
[23:54 lafloor] Do you want your bishop back?
[23:54 lafloor] Why don't you move your other one?
[23:54 lafloor] You should take that pawn in his way.
[23:54 lafloor] You should do that right now
[23:54 H3K] Did I say NO DO-OVERS? I should have.
[23:55 H3K] It is white's move
[23:55 guevara] Jes, it is white's move, no?
[23:55 lafloor] I don't know about do overs, but I'm gonna need a smoke break soon.
[23:55 lafloor] Oh my god, It's my move?
[23:55 guevara] You must finish it, then. I am at your mercy, senor.
[23:55 lafloor] I thought it was your move!
[23:55 lafloor] Hang on...
[23:55 lafloor] I thought it was your move!
[23:55 lafloor] Hang on...
[23:56 guevara] Jes!
[23:56 H3K] So am I
[23:56 Dono] lafloor: stay focused lafloor
[23:56 H3K] It is white's move (black having last moved his knight to rook 3
[23:56 H3K] LaFloor are you resuesting a time out?
[23:56 lafloor] got it now!
[23:57 lafloor] not yet Hal
[23:57 H3K] [The refereee is not allowed to smoke indoors]
[23:58 guevara] Smoke them if you got them, senor.
[23:58 H3K] Then I declare an Official time-out -- brb
[23:58 lafloor] pawn 2a - 4a
[23:58 lafloor] oh
[23:58 lafloor] if he's going, so am i
[23:59 lafloor] i'll brb
[23:59 lafloor] DO NOT MOVE MY PIECES WHILE I AM GONE
[23:59 guevara] I would not think of it, senorita.
[00:01 guevara] Nh6-g4
[00:06 lafloor] I'm back
[00:06 lafloor] And I'm ready to move
[00:06 H3K] The referee has returned: the last two moves are white P-QR4; black N-KN5
[00:06 H3K] white's move
[00:06 lafloor] shall I wait for Hal though?
[00:07 guevara] Mirra. Hal is here.
[00:07 guevara] Mira, I mean.
[00:07 guevara] Mira, Mira.
[00:08 lafloor] knight 3f - 5g
[00:09 H3K] N - KN5
[00:10 guevara] Rh8-f8
[00:10 H3K] R - KB1
[00:11 lafloor] Knight 3c - 5d
[00:12 guevara] You are taking the pawn, jes?
[00:12 H3K] NxP @ Q5
[00:12 lafloor] Oui.
[00:12 guevara] Write it 3cx5d
[00:13 guevara] Grrr
[00:13 H3K] yes
[00:13 lafloor] however you lose a pawn, that's how I write it!
[00:13 lafloor] 3cx5d
[00:14 guevara] N6c-4b
[00:14 H3K] black's move
[00:14 H3K] never mind
[00:14 H3K] black: N-Q5
[00:17 guevara]
[00:17 H3K] This is why I do not impose a time limit... white's move. (and when did Dono disappear?)
[00:18 guevara] Dono has left the building. He saw that it was an easy match for his padrone.
[00:19 lafloor] knight 5g-7h
[00:19 lafloor] Dono has given up!!
[00:19 lafloor] I WILL NOT GIVE UP
[00:19 guevara] You are on the offensive senor!
[00:19 guevara] I will not give up!
[00:20 lafloor] can I ask a question?
[00:20 guevara] go ahead, I will move whilst you talk.
[00:20 lafloor] am I doing really bad?
[00:20 H3K] White: N - KR7
[00:20 H3K] Ask away
[00:20 H3K] Oh, that? Not for me to say
[00:20 guevara] Bf5xh7
[00:21 Dono] lafloor: i'm here
[00:21 guevara] You are beating the hell out of me. I am a foolish player.
[00:21 lafloor] oh my. that was bad!
[00:21 H3K] Black: BxN @ KN2
[00:21 Dono] lafloor: i was just looking up other places to sub "In Bloom" to
[00:21 guevara] But I just took you your horsey, senor.
[00:21 lafloor] You took my horsey!!
[00:21 Dono] lafloor:
[00:22 H3K] WB, Dono
[00:22 lafloor] Dono: !!
[00:22 lafloor] Dono: You lose faith!
[00:22 H3K] white's move
[00:22 Dono] lafloor: just kidding. actually i was spending the $50 I'm gonna get
[00:22 guevara] Move, senor. I feel the tide turning.
[00:23 H3K] [correction: that last move of black's was BxN @ KR2]
[00:24 lafloor] bishop 1f - 2g
[00:25 guevara] No private messaging, senor. I must inform you.
[00:25 H3K] white: B - KN2
[00:26 guevara] N4bx2c
[00:26 guevara] +
[00:27 guevara] Check
[00:27 H3K] you don't have a knight at 4b
[00:28 H3K] I think you mean d4
[00:28 guevara] No?
[00:28 H3K] NxQBP ch
[00:29 guevara] Where is my nearest Knight, senor?
[00:29 lafloor] he has a knight at 4b
[00:29 guevara] Thank you, senor. I thought so.
[00:29 H3K] at 4d -- the move is valid and I have recorded it
[00:29 guevara] It is that bastard notation of yours, Hal.
[00:29 lafloor] So is it 4bx2c?
[00:29 guevara] It is no good!
[00:30 guevara] Jes, LaFloor.
[00:30 guevara] Gracias, Hal. Vamos!
[00:30 H3K] That's as may be... I consider the algebraic to be the bastard, which I why I've been repeating them in oldstyle notation.
[00:30 lafloor] king 1e - 1f
[00:30 H3K] white, you are in check
[00:31 H3K] white: K - KB1
[00:31 Dono] lafloor: this is best out of 3, right?
[00:31 lafloor] I moved to 1f
[00:31 guevara] N2cxa1
[00:32 lafloor] Dono: I have him right where I want him!
[00:32 H3K] black: NxR @ QR1
[00:32 guevara] 1a, pardone.
[00:32 Dono] lafloor: whew! good thing.
[00:32 lafloor] Dono: knight 5dx8c
[00:33 lafloor] Dono: CHECK
[00:33 lafloor] knight 5dx8c
[00:33 H3K] that is not a possible move
[00:33 lafloor] check
[00:34 H3K] I think you mean N 5dx7c
[00:34 guevara] He means 7c, no?
[00:34 lafloor] knight 5d to 7c, sorry. Check
[00:34 guevara] Si!
[00:34 lafloor] NO nO
[00:34 lafloor] I'm getting confused. Knight 5d to 7 E
[00:35 lafloor] I mean 7 EE
[00:35 lafloor] SEVEN E! THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT
[00:35 H3K] Yes: black takes pawn at QB2 ch
[00:35 guevara] Q8dx7c
[00:35 guevara] A move is a move senor.
[00:35 guevara] I must defer to la ref.
[00:35 H3K] 7e? that does not make check.
[00:36 guevara] She is backtracking senor.
[00:36 H3K] Gueavara, stand down. White's move is not recorded
[00:36 lafloor] WAIT. YOUR QUEEN IS ON 8C
[00:36 guevara] I mean, he. Pardone. He saw the error of his first move.
[00:36 lafloor] I wanted knight 5d to 7E
[00:37 H3K] The queens are in the D file
[00:37 lafloor] I DID NOT SEE AN ERROR I TYPED IT WRONG IN MY EXCITEMENT BECAUSE I JUST WON
[00:37 lafloor] What the fuck?
[00:37 H3K] I am recording the move as White: N - K2 (which is 7e)
[00:37 lafloor] Both queens are in D file?
[00:38 lafloor] Oh this blows. I'm all fucked up.
[00:38 H3K] yes - they must face each other, as do the kings
[00:38 lafloor] Gimme a minute to sort this out, will you?
[00:38 guevara] Jes.
[00:38 H3K] There is a time-out on the field
[00:39 guevara] I have benefited from his inexperience.
[00:39 guevara] Does this make me guilty?
[00:39 lafloor] Oh fuck. I had the king and queen on hsi side reversed
[00:39 guevara] Mui no madre!
[00:39 H3K] sportsmanlike conduct would preclude you rubbing it in, Guevara
[00:40 guevara] But senor, she screamed at me when she thought I was finished!
[00:40 lafloor] He can rub it in! It's pretty funny!
[00:40 H3K] LaFloor, you may rectify the situation by locating his queen (on your board) at D1, and his King at F1
[00:41 H3K] (he has moved his king once)
[00:41 lafloor] Okay. Anhow. So since that's case, and since I chose to move my pawn, do you want it to be to 7 c or 7 e? I don't care.
[00:41 H3K] Oh wait... I'm osrry, that's you.
[00:41 H3K] Gorram algebraic
[00:41 lafloor] Yeah, that's me
[00:41 guevara] Si, I have never moved my king, senor.
[00:42 lafloor] So where is his king and queen?
[00:42 H3K] Neither his king or quen have moved yet. they are at D8 (queen) and E8 (king)
[00:42 lafloor] Your king is on 8e and your queen is on 8 d, correct?
[00:42 guevara] Have I captured the Knight with my queen, senor?
[00:42 H3K] correct
[00:42 lafloor] Okay. Well, I commited to that fucking knight
[00:43 H3K] that move has not been recorded yet. Reapeat it, please
[00:43 lafloor] Yes, you've captured the knight, but I don't know what square you got it form
[00:43 lafloor] Where is your queen after taking the horsey?
[00:43 guevara] c7
[00:43 lafloor] Dono: BOYO did I fuck up!!
[00:43 lafloor] Dono: I'll fix it. Really. Maybe I can fix it!
[00:44 guevara] Lay on, senor.
[00:44 H3K] WAIT!!!
[00:44 lafloor] HE SAID IT
[00:45 lafloor] DON'T YOU HELP HIM!
[00:45 H3K] I recorded white's last move as KNight to E7 -- which puts it in the square in front of your king.
[00:45 guevara] Aye yi yi, what now senor?
[00:45 lafloor] HIS QUEEN IS FUCKING TOAST
[00:45 guevara] Senor, replay the tape, I moved to c7
[00:45 lafloor] OH, alright!
[00:45 guevara] To take his horsey.
[00:45 lafloor] STEVE
[00:45 H3K] to take that knioght with your queen, that leaves her at E7, not C7
[00:45 lafloor] DO NOT FIGHT TO PUT YOUR QUEEN AT C7
[00:46 guevara] I was in check, senor. I had no other move.
[00:46 lafloor] We are all fucked up here
[00:46 H3K] NO, you were not
[00:46 lafloor] I'm just saying
[00:46 H3K] I was told the move was to e7 -- that did not put you in check
[00:46 lafloor] I don't want Steve thinking I screwed him here. Can I recap briefly?
[00:47 lafloor] Steve, I asked you, do you want me to move that knight to 7c or 7e?
[00:47 lafloor] And then you will take it with your queen.
[00:47 H3K] I am the refree, I will recap, by asking questions
[00:47 guevara] I thought your Knight was on C7
[00:47 guevara] Ok, I will hold.
[00:47 H3K] LaFloor, did you mean to take th pawn and put Guevara in check?
[00:48 lafloor] I meant to do that but I had it backward, and now I don't know what's fair to do here.
[00:48 lafloor] I'm really sorry.
[00:49 lafloor] I don't want to fuck over Don, but when I was confused...
[00:49 H3K] Or was you move to E7 based on your mistaken position of his king?
[00:49 lafloor] I FOUGHT to put that knight at 7e instead of 7c
[00:49 lafloor] YES! My move to 7e was based on my mistake, and that's MY fault
[00:49 lafloor] Now that I see it correctly, OF COURSE I'd want to go to 7c.
[00:50 H3K] Do I leave it as is?
[00:50 lafloor] But I don't think that's fair to do.
[00:50 lafloor] I don't know!
[00:50 H3K] OK -- I understand...
[00:50 H3K] The OFFICIAL RULING is as follows:
[00:50 lafloor] I screwed up, so you should call it as you see it.
[00:51 H3K] white: NxP @ C7 ch
[00:51 H3K] black: QxP @c7
[00:51 H3K] white's move
[00:52 lafloor] Is his queen now on C7?
[00:52 H3K] yes
[00:52 lafloor] and his king is on 8e?
[00:52 H3K] yes
[00:55 lafloor] Queen 1d - 4d
[00:56 H3K] An official time out is called -- please do not post moves until I return.
[00:56 H3K] damn...
[00:56 H3K] white: Q - Q4
[00:56 lafloor] Sorry I'm so dumb Steve (and Don, especially!)
[00:56 H3K] Time Out
[00:57 guevara] No problemo.
[00:57 guevara] This is your first time, you are killing me.
[00:57 guevara] I am humbled.
[00:57 lafloor] I'm not killing you! You got my horseys!
[00:57 lafloor] and a rook and a pawn!
[00:58 lafloor] I am dying a slow, cold death
[00:58 lafloor] but I'll fuck you up somehow
[00:58 guevara] Jes.
[00:58 guevara] But you are still on the offensive.
[00:58 lafloor] Can I ask you a question?
[00:58 lafloor] Where is my remaining rook?
[00:58 guevara] Shoot.
[00:58 guevara] h1
[00:58 lafloor] okay
[00:59 guevara] 1h
[00:59 lafloor] Can I ask another question?
[00:59 guevara] shoot
[01:00 lafloor] forget it.
[01:00 lafloor] I'm developing a strategy now
[01:01 guevara] ra8-d8
[01:02 H3K] The Ref has returned -- Guevara is that your move?
[01:02 guevara] or to be more clear
[01:02 guevara] yes
[01:02 H3K] recorded: black: R - Q1
[01:02 guevara] Rook a8-d8
[01:03 H3K] the polite chess thing to sat is "guardez" -- i.e., white's queen should watch her ass
[01:04 lafloor] Queen 4d-4e
[01:04 guevara] En guardez, madam!
[01:04 lafloor] Now you're just pissing me off!
[01:04 H3K] white: Q - K4
[01:05 guevara] Bishop h7x4e
[01:05 lafloor] FUCK
[01:06 guevara]
[01:06 lafloor] bishop 2g-4e
[01:06 H3K] black: BxQ @ E4
[01:06 H3K] ou missed a better move, Guevara
[01:07 H3K] white: BxB @ E4
[01:07 guevara] Damn you hal, I'm not a computer.
[01:07 guevara] Touche, Guy.
[01:07 H3K] neither am I, IRL
[01:08 guevara] Queen 7cx5c
[01:09 H3K] but... you had checkmate in one move, just so you know
[01:09 guevara] I love that show, My Name is IRL.
[01:09 guevara] Now who's rubbing it in?
[01:09 H3K] black: QxP @C5
[01:10 guevara] Sir, you have my permission to pull Hal's cord bundle.
[01:10 lafloor] I don't understand that move. Don't you have a pawn on 6C?
[01:10 guevara] No pawn on 6c, not on my board.
[01:11 H3K] no, you took that in the porcess of repaifing the earlier fuckup
[01:11 lafloor] a pawn on 6C?
[01:11 H3K] it's white's move (black to mate in 1)
[01:11 lafloor] I took that?
[01:12 H3K] you did -- and it was on c7, not c6
[01:13 lafloor] king 1e - 1f
[01:14 H3K] your king is already on 1F
[01:14 guevara] I have your king on 1f right now, senor.
[01:14 lafloor] Yeah, I fucking lost, I know
[01:15 lafloor] go ahead, play it out, Greek Salad eater
[01:15 guevara] Do you concede senor?
[01:15 lafloor] No, I don't concede. Just play it out.
[01:15 guevara] Do not spit in my Greek Salad, senor. I become ill very easily.
[01:16 guevara] But your move is false, senor.
[01:16 guevara] Your king was already on f1, no?
[01:16 lafloor] I spit ice chips in your Greek salad, senor.
[01:16 lafloor] My king was already on f1?
[01:16 H3K] It is still your move, White
[01:17 H3K] Yes, your king currently resides @ F1
[01:17 guevara] Si, that is what we have been telling you.
[01:18 guevara] Do I have to whip out the Kobiashi Maru on your ass?
[01:18 H3K] That is a Starfleet maneouver, not a chess gambit
[01:18 lafloor] then I move my pawn 2e to 3e
[01:18 lafloor] kobiashu maru Keyser Soze this, Guevara!
[01:19 H3K] excellent choice -- white: P - K3
[01:19 guevara] Very well.
[01:19 H3K] no longer mate in 1, black... your move
[01:20 guevara] You had me all excited, you damn machine!
[01:21 H3K] You could ahve ended this three moves ago, but you had to get greedy for a queen...
[01:21 guevara] Queen c5xc1
[01:21 guevara] Check
[01:21 H3K] black: QxB @ C1
[01:21 H3K] check
[01:22 lafloor] King 1f - 2g
[01:23 H3K] white: K - KN2
[01:24 guevara] Ng4xf2
[01:25 guevara] Wait!
[01:25 guevara] Too late. MY bad.
[01:25 guevara] My queen is gone.
[01:25 lafloor] rook 1h - 1e
[01:25 lafloor] er, 1c
[01:26 H3K] black: NxP @ F2
[01:26 guevara] Si.
[01:26 H3K] white: RxQ @ C1
[01:27 guevara] Knight f2xf4
[01:28 H3K] you take the bishop? that's e4
[01:28 guevara] Errr, I meanE4
[01:28 H3K] black: NxB @ E4
[01:28 guevara] I am making mui mui mistakes! Aye yi yi!
[01:29 lafloor] I WANTED THAT BISHOP, GUEVARA!
[01:29 lafloor] You are really making this difficult!
[01:29 guevara] I wanted that Queen, madone!
[01:29 Dono] lafloor:
[01:29 H3K] It is the opinion of the referee tht white should consider resigning.
[01:29 H3K] It is the opinion of the referee tht white should consider resigning.
[01:30 guevara] My queen, which I sacrificed like a maricone!
[01:30 H3K] This is, btw, no reflection on the captial for which this game is played.
[01:30 lafloor] rook 1c to 7c
[01:31 H3K] white: R - QB7
[01:31 H3K] (isn't that a Leon Uris novel?)
[01:31 lafloor] You know Don, I'd have still gotten my ass kicked, but it really didn't help IN BLOOM that I set up the freaking chess board wrong
[01:31 guevara] Hold on, you. I'm thinking!
[01:32 guevara] Rookd8-d2 Check
[01:32 Dono] lafloor: that actually might have helped you
[01:32 lafloor] I apologize for that, and I'd like to apologize to the ref and Guevara for my confusion in this.
[01:33 guevara] Without your mistake, I'd have already been beaten, senor.
[01:33 H3K] No aplogoes needed to me -- we got it straightened out
[01:33 H3K] black: R - Q7 ch
[01:34 lafloor] king 2g - 3h
[01:35 H3K] white: K - KR3
[01:35 Dono] lafloor: it aint over till its over, lafloor!
[01:35 guevara] N e4-g2 check
[01:36 H3K] that
[01:36 H3K] s f2
[01:36 H3K] black: N - KB7 ch
[01:40 lafloor] king 3h - 2g
[01:41 H3K] white: K - KN2
[01:41 guevara] N g2-f4
[01:41 guevara] check
[01:42 H3K] black: N - K5 ch
[01:43 lafloor] I thought your knight was on f2?
[01:43 H3K] btw, black, your knight was on f2 before, it's now on e4
[01:44 lafloor] his knight is now on e4?
[01:44 guevara] Sorry. f2-34
[01:44 guevara] is what I meant
[01:44 guevara] Err, I mean e4
[01:44 H3K] no problemo
[01:44 lafloor] king 2g - 3f
[01:44 guevara] Too many cervasas.
[01:45 H3K] white: K - KB3
[01:46 guevara] king e1-d1
[01:46 H3K] black: K - Q1
[01:47 lafloor] 8e - 8 d, that is, right?
[01:48 guevara] Err, that's right. Again. Sorry.
[01:48 H3K] yes
[01:48 H3K] tough reading upside down, eh?
[01:48 guevara] King e8-d8
[01:48 guevara] Si.
[01:50 lafloor] king 3fx4e
[01:51 H3K] good for you! white: KxN @E4
[01:51 guevara] King 8dx7c
[01:52 H3K] black: KxR @ C7
[01:52 guevara] It's a battle of nutrition.
[01:52 H3K] And your'e both starving
[01:53 guevara] Jes.
[01:53 Dono] lafloor: Go Lafloor!
[01:53 guevara] I will be your straight man. Do you work here often?
[01:53 lafloor] king 3g x 4g
[01:53 lafloor] that was wrong
[01:53 lafloor] I meant pawn 3g - 4g
[01:54 guevara] Si.
[01:54 H3K] that's better... white: P - KN4
[01:54 guevara] Pawn h5xg4
[01:55 lafloor] oops!
[01:55 guevara] When do I whip out my en passant on his ass?
[01:55 H3K] black: PXP @ g4
[01:56 guevara] I want my queen back, suckah!
[01:56 lafloor] pawn 4a - 5a
[01:56 lafloor] you're gonna get her
[01:56 H3K] white: P - QR5
[01:57 guevara] pawn g4-g3
[01:57 H3K] black: P - KN6
[01:58 lafloor] king 4e - 3f
[01:58 lafloor] oh fuck
[01:58 lafloor] didn't see that!
[01:59 H3K] white: K - KB3
[01:59 guevara] pawn g3-g2
[01:59 H3K] The referee calls time
[01:59 guevara] My queen, I shall not forsake ye!
[01:59 lafloor] then I'm going too
[02:00 guevara] Wherefore Dono?
[02:01 guevara] Queen me, baby!
[02:01 Dono] lafloor: still here
[02:01 guevara] I mean, bambino!
[02:02 guevara] Dono, it has been a bitter fight.
[02:02 guevara] Truly, thank you for attending this grudge match.
[02:02 Dono] lafloor: my pleasure
[02:04 guevara] As Hal said before it all started, it's a farce. I don't know if we proved anything by this except keeping you and the others up past their bed time. But, ya know. You try new ways of doing things. Win some, lose some.
[02:04 guevara] I hope you will submit something next quarter.
[02:04 lafloor] i'm back
[02:05 lafloor] if he does, give him a better chess player at least
[02:05 H3K] So am I
[02:05 guevara] Undale!
[02:05 H3K] You need spanish lessons, Senor
[02:05 guevara] or is it Andale?
[02:05 lafloor] I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to do anymore.
[02:06 Dono] lafloor: thanks for playing in my honor lafloor!
[02:06 guevara] My Spanish is untrustworthy ever since I moved to Albuquerque.
[02:06 lafloor] I guess I'm move my king back to 4e
[02:06 H3K] it's black's move
[02:06 guevara] Queen me baby!
[02:06 guevara] g1
[02:07 H3K] Oh, wait -- my mistake. He took it as I was calling time
[02:07 guevara] Lafloor moved king 4e.
[02:07 guevara] I have been queened.]
[02:08 H3K] so: black" P - g2; white K - e4; black P- G1 and it turns gay
[02:08 lafloor] it's cool. I moved my king to 3e, he got queened, so I guess it's back to me again
[02:08 H3K] White's move
[02:08 H3K] Your king is on e4
[02:09 guevara] Si, e4
[02:09 lafloor] king to 5e
[02:09 guevara] That is moving into check, senor.
[02:09 H3K] white: K - K5
[02:09 H3K] no it's not
[02:09 guevara] You can no do that.
[02:10 H3K] that is, it's not check
[02:10 lafloor] from where am I getting checked?
[02:10 lafloor] oh, it's not check
[02:10 lafloor] but it will be in about two moves!
[02:10 guevara] So that pawn I have there on e3 is not there?
[02:10 guevara] err, e6
[02:11 lafloor] you have a pawn on 6e
[02:11 H3K] youe mean e6, but it doesn't threaten the king at e5
[02:11 guevara] I mean. Shall I pull it from the board?
[02:11 H3K] No, it's postion is correct -- your surmise is not
[02:11 lafloor] no, it's there, but why is that check?
[02:11 guevara] OK.
[02:11 guevara] My wrong
[02:11 lafloor] Can't pawns only take a piece on the diagonal?
[02:12 H3K] It'sn ot check -- pawns check as they capture, on the diagonal
[02:12 lafloor] oh. I fear I should have castled long ago. Is it too late to go back and do so?
[02:12 H3K] waaaaaaaaaay too late
[02:12 lafloor] oh. shucks
[02:12 guevara] Rook d2-d5 check
[02:13 H3K] black: R - Q3 ch
[02:14 lafloor] king to 5e
[02:14 H3K] You're on 5e
[02:14 H3K] you mean 4e?
[02:15 lafloor] i meant 4f
[02:15 lafloor] it's um, it's 2 am here. pardon my punchiness
[02:15 guevara] Si. Got it.
[02:16 H3K] OK -- white: K - KB4
[02:16 guevara] Queen 1g-2h check
[02:17 H3K] yes -- Q - KR2 ch
[02:18 lafloor] king to 4e
[02:19 H3K] white: K - K4
[02:19 lafloor] you've got me now I think
[02:20 lafloor] do you have me now?
[02:20 guevara] Pawnf2-f4 check
[02:21 guevara] Probably, I am not very good, though.
[02:21 H3K] black: P - KN4 ch
[02:21 lafloor] I don't know what you just did, are you upside down again?
[02:22 H3K] oops - KB4
[02:22 guevara] Yes. Pawn f7-f5
[02:22 H3K] yes, he's upside down
[02:23 lafloor] king to f3
[02:23 H3K] you have only one move, white
[02:23 H3K] K to f3
[02:24 H3K] done
[02:24 lafloor] i just did that
[02:24 H3K] I see (gorram lag in this chat)
[02:25 guevara] Rook f8-h8
[02:25 H3K] black: R - R1
[02:26 guevara] Tis a cruel game.
[02:26 lafloor] pawn 3e - 4e
[02:27 H3K] good choice -- white: P - K4
[02:27 guevara] Pawn 5fx4e
[02:27 guevara] Check
[02:28 lafloor] yes, 'tis. Well played Guevara. *spit* Very well played. I have respect for your chess moves -- if not for your choice in blowing off IN BLOOM!
[02:28 H3K] PxP @ E4 - check
[02:28 guevara] This way, IN BLOOM had a sporting chacne, senor.
[02:28 lafloor] king 3fx4e
[02:28 guevara] I almost lost this with such boneheaded moves as I made.
[02:29 guevara] Going down fighting!
[02:29 H3K] to quote Cobain: "oh well, whatever, never mind"
[02:29 H3K] white KxP @4e
[02:29 guevara] Rook h8xh4 check
[02:30 deplancher] has joined the room.
[02:30 lafloor] I would love to take your lousy rook!
[02:30 lafloor] But, alas.
[02:30 guevara] You are surrounded, senor.
[02:30 lafloor] I know one thing I've learned from this -- if I ever had any interest in chess, it's long gone!
[02:30 H3K] Gaby!
[02:31 deplancher] Bonjour!
[02:31 guevara] You have come to witness the coup de grace, mademoiselle.[02:31 lafloor] pawn 5ax6b
[02:31 deplancher] You need another witness, I heard the scream.
[02:31 guevara] Bonjour!
[02:32 H3K] don't kid yourself -- there's no grace in this coup
[02:32 guevara] NO grace, true, but coup.
[02:32 deplancher] I will be back. My hands are cold here. Knock it down!
[02:32 H3K] Um, guy -- there's nothing at 6b for your pawn to capture
[02:33 guevara] Queen 2g-2e check mate?
[02:33 lafloor] there isn't?
[02:33 H3K] no there isn't -- he never moved either of the pawns on that end
[02:34 H3K] Hang on, Guevara -- LaFloor still needs to move
[02:34 guevara] OK.
[02:34 guevara] I have re-set my queen, then.
[02:34 H3K] it wasn't mate anyway
[02:36 lafloor] I need to move? But it's illegal for me to take your rook, right?
[02:36 H3K] M'sieu LaFloor, we still await your move
[02:36 guevara] On my board, yes. It was.
[02:36 lafloor] so I go to 3e
[02:36 H3K] since the one you gave isn't possible
[02:36 H3K] OK
[02:36 H3K] white: K - K3
[02:37 H3K] now you, black
[02:37 guevara] Knight a1-c2 check mate?
[02:37 lafloor] roaring exciting stuff, huh gabby?
[02:38 H3K] um, you're right, it was... I'm tired too
[02:38 guevara] Si, even computers tire. Nada problemo.
[02:38 H3K] black: N - QB2 check....
[02:38 lafloor] 3e - 5e
[02:38 deplancher] has joined the room.
[02:38 guevara] CHECK MATE!
[02:39 guevara] lafloor: i MUST BREAK YOU.
[02:39 H3K] not mate -- white has a move
[02:39 deplancher] There is nothing so exciting as the little chess board.
[02:39 H3K] e3 - f3
[02:40 guevara] mY QUEEN IS NOT ON G2?
[02:40 H3K] white: K - KB3
[02:40 guevara] Sorry, caps lock.
[02:40 lafloor] his queen is on g2, it's checkmate
[02:41 H3K] f3 is an unthreatened square
[02:41 guevara] Gracias.
[02:41 guevara] G2 Queen takes f3 king
[02:41 H3K] queens do not check as knight's do
[02:41 lafloor] I don't understand that. I believe it's checkmate, because his queen is on g2
[02:41 deplancher] who controls the centre, Hal?
[02:42 H3K] Wait... on my voard, your queen is at H2!!!
[02:42 H3K] I must scroll back
[02:42 lafloor] his queen is on g2
[02:42 guevara] Correct, sir. Sir. G2
[02:42 guevara] You may have missed a move.
[02:43 lafloor] you still suck, Guevara!
[02:43 lafloor] But well, played!
[02:43 guevara] Si, si. It was an ugly match.
[02:43 guevara] No beautiful games here.
[02:43 lafloor] Yeah, ugly cause I coulnd't figure out the fucking pieces.
[02:43 guevara] Thank you. Hal, you did a fantastic job keeping things straight.
[02:43 lafloor] Thanks for the patience with it.
[02:43 guevara] All until that last g2 incident.
[02:43 lafloor] Thanks for giving In Bloom the extra shot
[02:44 guevara] Thanks everyone
[02:44 lafloor] Yeah! Well, by then there aren't many squares left
[02:44 deplancher] Dono has gone. Was that the VC?
[02:44 guevara] For this is a stunt. and I hope some good writing comes of it on the site.
[02:44 lafloor] Sorry Don >
[02:44 lafloor] In Bloom deserved a better champion.
[02:44 guevara] Yes, DeP.
[02:44 guevara] He was cheering on Guy.
[02:45 deplancher] Ok. Wish I would have dropped over earlier.
[02:45 lafloor] Okay, then I'm going too, is that alright? It's nearly 3 here
[02:45 H3K] Well, I can't scroll back, because no one will remain quite long enough -- this chat SUX!!!
[02:45 deplancher] Was it a succeth?
[02:45 lafloor] Again, well played Steve, I'm impressed!
[02:45 guevara] H3K, please write a scathing review of my idiot play. It will chasten me as I should be chastened.
[02:45 lafloor] Thanks for the shot.
[02:45 deplancher] Yike. G'night, Guy.
[02:45 lafloor] Scathe me and I'll kick your fucking ass.
[02:45 lafloor] Just saying.
[02:45 deplancher] Well put.
[02:45 lafloor] G'night.
[02:46 H3K] Gaby, how in hell do you transcribe these things???
[02:46 guevara] Good night. Thanks, Guy.
[02:46 guevara] Copy and paste.
[02:46 H3K] Gnight, Guy
[02:46 guevara] I can do it, Hal. No problemo.
[02:46 deplancher] I copied and pasted throughout.
[02:47 H3K] I got it, finally
[02:47 guevara] Sorry you just got here and it's all over, DeP.
[02:47 guevara] Well have another Rorschalk Group soon.
[02:47 H3K] [02:16 guevara] Queen 1g-2h check
[02:47 guevara] OK, Hal.
[02:47 deplancher] It's alright. I didn't know it was happening tonight...until I checked in. Oh well.
[02:48 H3K] Your queen was on 2H, gorramit
[02:48 guevara] No, it couldn't have been!
[02:48 deplancher] What! It wasn't over??
[02:48 H3K] on the other hand, you could have checkmated with the rook rather than taking the queen, hours ago...
[02:49 H3K] It was, and it still is on my board.
[02:49 deplancher] This will make great copy. And controversy.
[02:49 H3K] I just copied out of this chat
[02:50 guevara] Herm.
[02:50 H3K] For that, I think "In Bloom" should go up (even though I didn't like it)
[02:50 guevara] Yeah, I'm not a real good player, player.
[02:50 deplancher] Guy is not sleeping yet. But the Don man has fled.
[02:50 guevara] Fine!
[02:50 guevara] IN Bloom goes up.
[02:50 deplancher] 'Cap is redeemed...'
[02:51 guevara] Fair is fair.
[02:51 guevara] Hal, you said you copied this chat already, or were you just checking the moves?
[02:51 H3K] When you and I play, Guevara, it's ging to be online interactive, where the server controls the board (for instance, Yahoo)
[02:52 H3K] I can recopy to include the fatal discovery
[02:52 H3K] and I will
[02:52 guevara] Hal, it won't matter. It will be 10 minutes, tops.
[02:52 guevara] I will concede my chess retardedness.
[02:53 guevara] now!
[02:53 H3K] maybe so -- but there won't be any question about where the pieces are
[02:53 guevara] It's been years since I played.
[02:53 guevara] And it shows.
[02:53 deplancher] Did this work out though? The chess thing. You have been here for 4 hours?
[02:54 guevara] I wonder how my queen got on g2, though?
[02:54 guevara] That is a puzzlement.
[02:54 guevara] Yes, a battle of attrition, it was.
[02:54 H3K] anyway -- it's pushing 2 in the godawful morning here. I'm going to recopy to this point, and log off
[02:54 guevara] Bad play all around.
[02:54 H3K] you moved it there dummkopf
[02:54 deplancher] has joined the room.
[02:55 guevara] Good night, Hal. You really did a great job. Thank you.
[02:55 guevara] It would have been a mess without you.
[02:55 H3K] Goodnight, all
[02:55 guevara] Night.
[02:55 deplancher] G'night. Sweet dream wherever you are..
[02:56 guevara] Hey DeP. I better go too. Good night.
[02:56 guevara] I hope you are well.
The enmity of last week's meeting is far, far behind us. Hal 3000 (H3K) and Guy LaFloor have renewed my faith in this whole crazy venture, with the seminal work they have done. Concerning the In Bloom disagreement twixt those two, and, I need to mention, Pinckney Guevara. LaFloor was so vociferously 'For' In Bloom making it out of the Terminal "Alive" that Guevara wagered the piece's death or survival upon a chess game engaged in in the Conference Room.
The match went down Friday, December 16, 2005. It lasted 4 hours and ended in controversy. Guevara's queen, ostensibly on square g3 was integral in the final checkmate of LaFloor's king on e3, as facilited by a Knight moved a1-c2. Much gloating ensued by Guevara, when Hal 3000, refereeing the match, informed Guevara his Queen was not on square g2, but h2. By then, however, LaFloor had departed in disgrace, thinking In Bloom had met it's sorry fate.
Upon inspection of the transcript, Guevara conceded that his Queen -- having checkmated LaFloor's king by moving her h2-e2 -- but LaFloor's preceding pawn move had been illegal and had been commanded by the referee to move back to it's originating square at a5 and move again. Guevara, in his excitement had not noticed LaFloor's illegal pawn move, and had moved Queen h2-e2 checkmate and it took some time to where H3K and LaFloor could make him understand he needed to re-set that queen and allow white (LaFloor) to re-do that offending pawn move. Guevara re-set to g2 then, instead of h2, thereby laying the disastrous end game checkmate that wasn't.
However, in Guevara's defense, LaFloor was stripped to a King and two pawns, while he had for pawns, 2 rooks and his queen still actively pursuing LaFloor's king on the board. Surely, victory was inevitable. Leaving In Bloom's sad fate sealed.
However, Guevara's error can not be glossed over, thereby giving In Bloom (and LaFloor) victory, and life by technicality.
Transcript of match follows:
[22:54 lafloor] Dono: No, I'm supposed to get the KING!
[22:55 lafloor] Hal, Dono is the writer of the capital in question tonight
[22:55 H3K] Ah.. pleased to meet you
[22:55 lafloor] I am going to ICE Guevara in this game so that in Bloom can move on, and Dono will witness it!
[22:55 Dono] lafloor: Hi H3K
[22:55 Dono] lafloor: So how does this work?
[22:56 H3K] going outside for a quick smoke before the match commences. brb
[22:56 lafloor] I guess once Guevara show up we'll just list our moves
[22:56 lafloor] okay Hal
[22:56 lafloor] And as we list our moves, we each have a chessboard in front of us
[22:56 lafloor] so we can follow the game
[22:57 lafloor] I bought a chessboard today to do this!
[22:57 lafloor] It's cheap and cardboard.
[22:57 lafloor] but I also watched Searching for Bobby Fisher
[22:57 Dono] lafloor: HA! I was just going to ask.
[22:57 lafloor] so I think I have a clear advantage now
[22:57 lafloor] really, though, don't get your hopes up.
[22:57 lafloor] From what I glean, Guevara knows how to play
[22:58 lafloor] And I'm still reading directions
[22:58 Dono] lafloor: i think the faster you move the better
[22:58 lafloor] Are you serious?
[22:58 Dono] lafloor: gives the other guy less time to plan
[22:58 lafloor] I have to move fast?
[22:58 lafloor] Oh jesus
[22:58 lafloor] Alright, I'll try to move fast
[22:58 guevara] Hola!
[22:58 lafloor] Guevara!
[22:58 Dono] lafloor: its called the hit and run method
[22:58 lafloor] Bonjour!
[22:59 lafloor] You ready to to eat puck, Guevara?
[22:59 guevara] I will be black. I concede to the hockey goon the first move
[22:59 guevara] Mr. Capone, my condolences.
[23:00 lafloor] That's mighty kind of you, Guevara.
[23:00 Dono] lafloor: making it up
[23:00 lafloor] Gentlemanly, even
[23:00 guevara] I am, yes.
[23:00 lafloor] Dono: And I was going to try and do it!! Don't screw with me like that!
[23:00 Dono] lafloor: but it is my theory on why newbies beat real chessplayers sometimes
[23:00 guevara] No need to gloat before I mop floor with Canadian?
[23:01 lafloor] Dono: I will try it then
[23:01 guevara] Or should I say mop La Floor?
[23:01 lafloor] Yes, G, I would like to get some pre-gloating in if that's allowed!
[23:01 lafloor] You're so punny, Guevara!
[23:01 guevara] Please, do your worst.
[23:01 lafloor] I'm going to skate all over your greek salad ass!
[23:01 guevara] Is that all you have got?
[23:01 lafloor] And then enjoy roast beef with everyone on the floor
[23:02 guevara] My chessboard gently weeps.
[23:02 lafloor] My chessboard is only 5 inches big
[23:02 guevara] Move, at your peril.
[23:02 lafloor] Don't let that intimidate you though
[23:02 guevara] It sounds like a personal problem to me.
[23:02 lafloor] Do we need to wait for Hal?
[23:02 lafloor] He's having a quick smoke
[23:02 H3K] *ahem*
[23:02 lafloor] Or should we start anyhow?
[23:02 lafloor] He's having a quick smoke
[23:02 H3K] *ahem*
[23:02 lafloor] Or should we start anyhow?
[23:03 guevara] Hal is up on my screen.
[23:03 lafloor] Hal!
[23:03 H3K] Yes, you need to wait for me
[23:03 lafloor] Oh crap
[23:03 lafloor] Now I have to begin?
[23:03 H3K] Stand by while I set up the board
[23:03 guevara] No kidney punches.
[23:03 guevara] Standing by, Senor Machine.
[23:04 guevara] lafloor: I must break you.
[23:05 Dono] lafloor: I'll reimburse you for the board
[23:05 lafloor] Guevara -- let me make sure I have it right --
[23:05 guevara] lafloor: Jes?
[23:05 lafloor] My left hand rook is on space A1, right?
[23:05 guevara] lafloor: I have diagrams. Symbol charts, tarot cards, too.
[23:05 guevara] lafloor: Jes.
[23:06 lafloor] and your left hand rook is on space H8
[23:06 guevara] lafloor: Your Queen is also on your left hand side.
[23:06 lafloor] You may have props, but I have righteous indignance on my side!
[23:06 guevara] lafloor: Correct, my left hand rook is H*
[23:07 guevara] lafloor: Give me my props!
[23:07 lafloor] I can't tell the queen pieces from the king, so I put a dot of nail polish on them
[23:07 guevara] Dono: I must break you, too.
[23:07 lafloor] I may have a cross-dressing king, actually
[23:07 guevara] Your ingenuity is startling.
[23:07 Dono] lafloor: i'm in serious trouble here
[23:07 lafloor] Guevara, one more question --
[23:07 guevara] Were is the Machine?
[23:08 guevara] Jes.
[23:08 guevara] Go ahead.
[23:08 lafloor] What is your overall strategy and how can I easily diffuse it? Can you tell me that upfront, please?
[23:08 H3K] *ahem*
[23:09 lafloor] Hal is ready!
[23:09 lafloor] Oh crap
[23:09 guevara] To use my 4th language, German: Blitzkrieg!
[23:09 lafloor] I mean -- PREPARE TO SUFFER!
[23:09 H3K] As referee for this farce, I make the following official announcements:
[23:09 lafloor] Okay, here's my opening move --
[23:09 guevara] Vamos!
[23:09 guevara] Ahem.
[23:09 guevara] Rules first, Guy.
[23:09 H3K] (1) Be cautioned that I am not familiar with the so-called algebraic notation
[23:10 guevara] But you have the link, right?
[23:10 H3K] I am working with a crib sheet, as you undoubtedly are.
[23:10 guevara] Jes, Yo say.
[23:10 lafloor] I am working with a crib sheet, yes
[23:10 H3K] (2) This match shallbe played to checkmate. A resignation by one side is a win for the other.
[23:11 lafloor] Okay. What are the rules?
[23:11 guevara] Si, si.
[23:11 lafloor] Oui, Oui
[23:11 H3K] (3) In the event of a draw, the referee reserves the right to determine the disposition of the capital venture for which this game is being played.
[23:12 guevara] Si, it is agreed. Vamos!
[23:12 lafloor] Wait!
[23:12 H3K] The rules are the rules of the game of chess.
[23:12 lafloor] I'm not an idiot!
[23:12 lafloor] Most chess matches are draws!
[23:12 lafloor] That means I did all this for nothing!
[23:12 lafloor] Aren't most chess matches draws?
[23:12 H3K] I suspect that a draw is a very UNlikely event, so untwist your knickers, LaFloor.
[23:13 guevara] Si!
[23:13 Dono] lafloor: thats tic tac toe you're thinking of lafloor
[23:13 Dono] lafloor: thats tic tac toe you're thinking of lafloor
[23:13 guevara] I grow weary of your prattling and obfuscations.
[23:13 lafloor] Dono: I'm pretty good at tick tac toes
[23:13 guevara] Attendez vous!
[23:14 lafloor] Fine, I begin ...
[23:14 Dono] lafloor: is it too late to change the game?
[23:14 lafloor] Pawn H2 to H4
[23:14 H3K] The rules of engagement are as follows: white (LaFloor) moves first.
[23:14 guevara] ERm, French is my 3rd language.
[23:14 Dono] lafloor: tic tac toe
[23:14 H3K] There will be NO cross chatter by either player.
[23:14 guevara] Si. I give la floor to LaFloor.
[23:15 H3K] Comments by the specators will be kept to a minimum, please...
[23:15 H3K] Comments by the specators will be kept to a minimum, please...
[23:15 guevara] Si. Vamanos muchachos!
[23:15 lafloor] I don't understand the no cross chatter rule?
[23:15 H3K] The players will confine themselve to the notation of their moves.
[23:15 lafloor] Does that mean I ONLY speak my moves while playing?
[23:15 guevara] Si.
[23:15 lafloor] Oh
[23:15 lafloor] Okay
[23:15 H3K] I will not impose a time limit -- I do not have a stopwatch.
[23:16 guevara] Blitzkrieg!
[23:16 lafloor] So this is going to be a really FUN match then, huh?
[23:16 H3K] The referee also reserves the right to call timeouts during the game, as do both players.
[23:16 guevara] I must apologize in advance, senor Capone.
[23:16 guevara] I did enjoy los capital.
[23:16 lafloor] I must alos apologize, Mr. Capone
[23:16 guevara] But now...
[23:17 guevara] adios amigo!
[23:17 Dono] guevara: i have confidence in lafloor!
[23:17 Dono] guevara: i have confidence in lafloor!
[23:17 guevara] Shall we dance?
[23:17 H3K] Are the players ready?
[23:17 Dono] guevara: she has 2 queens!
[23:17 guevara] Confidence is a child's trinket, senor.
[23:17 guevara] To be crushed under the boot heel of opression!'
[23:18 guevara] Viva la revoluccione!
[23:18 lafloor] Je suis ready.
[23:18 H3K] I repeat, are the players ready?
[23:18 guevara] Or however that damn thing is spelt.
[23:18 Dono] lafloor: win one for the gipper, lafloor
[23:18 guevara] Si, senor!
[23:18 lafloor] Yeah, yeah, La dolce vita and all
[23:18 guevara] I stand naked before you.
[23:18 H3K] Then LET'S GET READY TO RUMMMMMBLE!!!!
[23:18 H3K] White (LaFloor) your move.
[23:19 guevara] Who let Michael Buffer in the Octagon!
[23:19 lafloor] I don't know, but he's good!
[23:19 lafloor] Oh. Okay. Here goes:
[23:19 lafloor] Pawn H2 to H4
[23:19 guevara] Si.
[23:19 Dono] lafloor: put some nirvana on and get pumped up!
[23:20 guevara] The French defense is in order I see.
[23:20 H3K] KRP - P4
[23:20 H3K] black?
[23:20 guevara] d2-d4
[23:20 lafloor] Dono: what the fuck is he talking about French defense? We're done!
[23:21 H3K] QP - P4
[23:21 guevara] I see you have a confederate in the audience. No coaching I say!
[23:21 H3K] stand by, please
[23:21 guevara] H3K, are you mad?
[23:21 Dono] lafloor:
[23:21 guevara] I mean, 'Insane'?
[23:22 lafloor] Guevara? Are YOU? *I'm* in the row 2
[23:22 H3K] sorry - Real Life intervened. Resume, please
[23:23 lafloor] I don't understand Guevara's move
[23:23 guevara] H3K, has moved for you?
[23:23 H3K] just play
[23:23 guevara] Oh, wait
[23:23 lafloor] d2-d4 would be MY pieces, I thought
[23:23 guevara] Pawn h2-h4
[23:23 guevara] that is my first move
[23:23 lafloor] He needs to make a move out of row 7 or 8, I thought
[23:23 guevara] Now, are we straight?
[23:23 H3K] Wait, please
[23:24 guevara] Oh yeah. Sorry!
[23:24 guevara] Pawn h7-h5
[23:24 lafloor] No, we are not straight. If you are playing black, you would be rows 7 and 8 right now, I think
[23:24 H3K] In algebraic notation, the designations do not change depending on the POV
[23:24 guevara] Pardon!
[23:24 guevara] I am a bit rattle by your hockey stick.
[23:25 guevara] Correct! My mistake. Forgive. Play on!
[23:25 lafloor] I understand the move now!
[23:25 H3K] black's first move is h7-h5 (KRP - R 4))
[23:25 lafloor] I have a very large and forceful stick, Guevara, it's understandable
[23:25 H3K] white?
[23:25 H3K] white?
[23:26 guevara] I was looking at my diagram upside down.
[23:26 lafloor] Pawn 2G - 3G
[23:26 Dono] lafloor: good move!
[23:26 guevara] I must use the Going After Cacciotto defense, methinks.
[23:26 lafloor] It's fine Guevara, I was just worried I was already totally confused
[23:26 Dono] lafloor: keep up the pressure!
[23:26 H3K] P - KN3
[23:26 H3K] black?
[23:26 guevara] Uno momento whilst I move your piece.
[23:27 guevara] d7-d5
[23:28 H3K] QP - Q4
[23:28 lafloor] knight 1B - 3C
[23:29 H3K] white?
[23:29 H3K] N - QB3
[23:29 H3K] black?
[23:29 guevara] I am responding sir,
[23:30 guevara] Bc1-f5
[23:31 guevara] Bc8-f5 I mean
[23:31 guevara] pardon.
[23:32 guevara] Hello?
[23:32 lafloor] pawn 2d - 3d
[23:33 H3K] black B - KB4
[23:33 H3K] white P - Q3
[23:33 H3K] black's move
[23:34 guevara] Nb8-c3
[23:34 guevara] Nb8-c6 I mean
[23:34 guevara] Damn me!
[23:34 H3K] N - QB3
[23:35 guevara] Nb8-C6 is the move sir. I am duly chastised.
[23:35 H3K] I understood... white?
[23:35 guevara] Correct.
[23:36 guevara] lafloor: I must break you.
[23:37 lafloor] knight 1g - 3f
[23:37 Dono] lafloor:
[23:37 lafloor] guevara: i must not be broken!
[23:37 H3K] N - KB3
[23:37 lafloor] guevara: i will not be broken!
[23:38 Dono] lafloor: give him hell, lafloor!
[23:38 guevara] Pawn e7-e6
[23:38 H3K] P- K3
[23:39 guevara] Santa Maria, I'm not gonna break!
[23:40 H3K] The players will confine their remarks to their moves, please...
[23:40 H3K] whit'es move
[23:40 guevara] Pardon.
[23:40 guevara] I mean, PardOne!
[23:41 lafloor] pawn 3d - 4d
[23:41 lafloor] guevara: got reprimanded by the ref! BA HA!
[23:41 H3K] P -Q4
[23:42 guevara] Bf8-cc5
[23:43 H3K] B - QB 4
[23:44 guevara] Hal, you are confusing me with these Queen's bishops
[23:44 guevara] I must protest!
[23:44 guevara] La nombres do not correspond.
[23:45 guevara] But I do understand you.
[23:45 H3K] c5 is your QB4 -- read the diagram
[23:45 Dono] lafloor: he's running scared, lafloor. move in for the kill!
[23:45 guevara] But cease, or I shall kill you.
[23:46 guevara] My petition has been thrown out!
[23:46 guevara] lafloor: My name is Pinckney Guevara.
[23:46 guevara] lafloor: Prepare to die.
[23:46 H3K] The players will confine their remarks to their moves, please...
[23:47 lafloor] pawn 4d - 5c (can I do that?)
[23:47 guevara] Pardone!
[23:47 lafloor] guevara: you got yelled at again!
[23:47 guevara] Oh shit!
[23:47 H3K] For the sake of the VC and his capital, you do not wish me to stop play.
[23:47 guevara] Jes. I am taken.
[23:47 lafloor] can id o that? Can I take that bishop?
[23:47 lafloor] BA HA HA HA!
[23:48 guevara] Alas, poor bishop.
[23:48 H3K] Yes, you can. White: PxB
[23:48 lafloor] Don!! Did you see that? I got his BISHOP!!
[23:48 guevara] I will avenge you!
[23:48 lafloor] Oh, I'm sorry. That taunting was meant to be private
[23:48 H3K] Play on -- black's move
[23:48 H3K] Play on -- black's move
[23:48 guevara] Ng8-h6
[23:49 lafloor] Oh. I fucked up. The bastard tricked me!
[23:49 Dono] lafloor:
[23:49 guevara] Oh shit!
[23:49 guevara] I mean, caca!
[23:49 lafloor] No he didnt'!
[23:49 guevara] Mui madre.
[23:50 H3K] N - KR3
[23:50 lafloor] you're going down, Guevara!!
[23:50 H3K] white's move
[23:50 guevara] I finish strong, senor.
[23:51 lafloor] I'll finish YOu!
[23:51 guevara] The world is waiting senor.
[23:51 lafloor] What are you doing, btw? Consulting Big Blue for your moves?
[23:51 H3K] A yellow card is issued to both players for un-chessmanlike conduct.
[23:51 Dono] lafloor:
[23:51 guevara] Vamos!
[23:51 H3K] STFU and play, please.
[23:52 lafloor] Dono: I think I need to develop my pawns
[23:52 lafloor] Dono: I'm not sure what that means, but I don't knw how to do it anyhow
[23:52 lafloor] Dono: You tell me when I should bring out the Qeen though
[23:52 H3K] Note to LaFloor -- those called private mesages are visible to me, if not also to Guevara
[23:53 guevara] Oh, give the queen to me!
[23:53 H3K] unless you check the little P
[23:53 guevara] No private messaging! I must protest!
[23:53 guevara] Scoundrels!
[23:53 H3K] Duly noted -- play on
[23:53 lafloor] Hal, I knew that. It's my intimidation method. DOn't tell Guevara though
[23:53 guevara] I demand back my bishop!
[23:54 lafloor] Do you want your bishop back?
[23:54 lafloor] Why don't you move your other one?
[23:54 lafloor] You should take that pawn in his way.
[23:54 lafloor] You should do that right now
[23:54 H3K] Did I say NO DO-OVERS? I should have.
[23:55 H3K] It is white's move
[23:55 guevara] Jes, it is white's move, no?
[23:55 lafloor] I don't know about do overs, but I'm gonna need a smoke break soon.
[23:55 lafloor] Oh my god, It's my move?
[23:55 guevara] You must finish it, then. I am at your mercy, senor.
[23:55 lafloor] I thought it was your move!
[23:55 lafloor] Hang on...
[23:55 lafloor] I thought it was your move!
[23:55 lafloor] Hang on...
[23:56 guevara] Jes!
[23:56 H3K] So am I
[23:56 Dono] lafloor: stay focused lafloor
[23:56 H3K] It is white's move (black having last moved his knight to rook 3
[23:56 H3K] LaFloor are you resuesting a time out?
[23:56 lafloor] got it now!
[23:57 lafloor] not yet Hal
[23:57 H3K] [The refereee is not allowed to smoke indoors]
[23:58 guevara] Smoke them if you got them, senor.
[23:58 H3K] Then I declare an Official time-out -- brb
[23:58 lafloor] pawn 2a - 4a
[23:58 lafloor] oh
[23:58 lafloor] if he's going, so am i
[23:59 lafloor] i'll brb
[23:59 lafloor] DO NOT MOVE MY PIECES WHILE I AM GONE
[23:59 guevara] I would not think of it, senorita.
[00:01 guevara] Nh6-g4
[00:06 lafloor] I'm back
[00:06 lafloor] And I'm ready to move
[00:06 H3K] The referee has returned: the last two moves are white P-QR4; black N-KN5
[00:06 H3K] white's move
[00:06 lafloor] shall I wait for Hal though?
[00:07 guevara] Mirra. Hal is here.
[00:07 guevara] Mira, I mean.
[00:07 guevara] Mira, Mira.
[00:08 lafloor] knight 3f - 5g
[00:09 H3K] N - KN5
[00:10 guevara] Rh8-f8
[00:10 H3K] R - KB1
[00:11 lafloor] Knight 3c - 5d
[00:12 guevara] You are taking the pawn, jes?
[00:12 H3K] NxP @ Q5
[00:12 lafloor] Oui.
[00:12 guevara] Write it 3cx5d
[00:13 guevara] Grrr
[00:13 H3K] yes
[00:13 lafloor] however you lose a pawn, that's how I write it!
[00:13 lafloor] 3cx5d
[00:14 guevara] N6c-4b
[00:14 H3K] black's move
[00:14 H3K] never mind
[00:14 H3K] black: N-Q5
[00:17 guevara]
[00:17 H3K] This is why I do not impose a time limit... white's move. (and when did Dono disappear?)
[00:18 guevara] Dono has left the building. He saw that it was an easy match for his padrone.
[00:19 lafloor] knight 5g-7h
[00:19 lafloor] Dono has given up!!
[00:19 lafloor] I WILL NOT GIVE UP
[00:19 guevara] You are on the offensive senor!
[00:19 guevara] I will not give up!
[00:20 lafloor] can I ask a question?
[00:20 guevara] go ahead, I will move whilst you talk.
[00:20 lafloor] am I doing really bad?
[00:20 H3K] White: N - KR7
[00:20 H3K] Ask away
[00:20 H3K] Oh, that? Not for me to say
[00:20 guevara] Bf5xh7
[00:21 Dono] lafloor: i'm here
[00:21 guevara] You are beating the hell out of me. I am a foolish player.
[00:21 lafloor] oh my. that was bad!
[00:21 H3K] Black: BxN @ KN2
[00:21 Dono] lafloor: i was just looking up other places to sub "In Bloom" to
[00:21 guevara] But I just took you your horsey, senor.
[00:21 lafloor] You took my horsey!!
[00:21 Dono] lafloor:
[00:22 H3K] WB, Dono
[00:22 lafloor] Dono: !!
[00:22 lafloor] Dono: You lose faith!
[00:22 H3K] white's move
[00:22 Dono] lafloor: just kidding. actually i was spending the $50 I'm gonna get
[00:22 guevara] Move, senor. I feel the tide turning.
[00:23 H3K] [correction: that last move of black's was BxN @ KR2]
[00:24 lafloor] bishop 1f - 2g
[00:25 guevara] No private messaging, senor. I must inform you.
[00:25 H3K] white: B - KN2
[00:26 guevara] N4bx2c
[00:26 guevara] +
[00:27 guevara] Check
[00:27 H3K] you don't have a knight at 4b
[00:28 H3K] I think you mean d4
[00:28 guevara] No?
[00:28 H3K] NxQBP ch
[00:29 guevara] Where is my nearest Knight, senor?
[00:29 lafloor] he has a knight at 4b
[00:29 guevara] Thank you, senor. I thought so.
[00:29 H3K] at 4d -- the move is valid and I have recorded it
[00:29 guevara] It is that bastard notation of yours, Hal.
[00:29 lafloor] So is it 4bx2c?
[00:29 guevara] It is no good!
[00:30 guevara] Jes, LaFloor.
[00:30 guevara] Gracias, Hal. Vamos!
[00:30 H3K] That's as may be... I consider the algebraic to be the bastard, which I why I've been repeating them in oldstyle notation.
[00:30 lafloor] king 1e - 1f
[00:30 H3K] white, you are in check
[00:31 H3K] white: K - KB1
[00:31 Dono] lafloor: this is best out of 3, right?
[00:31 lafloor] I moved to 1f
[00:31 guevara] N2cxa1
[00:32 lafloor] Dono: I have him right where I want him!
[00:32 H3K] black: NxR @ QR1
[00:32 guevara] 1a, pardone.
[00:32 Dono] lafloor: whew! good thing.
[00:32 lafloor] Dono: knight 5dx8c
[00:33 lafloor] Dono: CHECK
[00:33 lafloor] knight 5dx8c
[00:33 H3K] that is not a possible move
[00:33 lafloor] check
[00:34 H3K] I think you mean N 5dx7c
[00:34 guevara] He means 7c, no?
[00:34 lafloor] knight 5d to 7c, sorry. Check
[00:34 guevara] Si!
[00:34 lafloor] NO nO
[00:34 lafloor] I'm getting confused. Knight 5d to 7 E
[00:35 lafloor] I mean 7 EE
[00:35 lafloor] SEVEN E! THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT
[00:35 H3K] Yes: black takes pawn at QB2 ch
[00:35 guevara] Q8dx7c
[00:35 guevara] A move is a move senor.
[00:35 guevara] I must defer to la ref.
[00:35 H3K] 7e? that does not make check.
[00:36 guevara] She is backtracking senor.
[00:36 H3K] Gueavara, stand down. White's move is not recorded
[00:36 lafloor] WAIT. YOUR QUEEN IS ON 8C
[00:36 guevara] I mean, he. Pardone. He saw the error of his first move.
[00:36 lafloor] I wanted knight 5d to 7E
[00:37 H3K] The queens are in the D file
[00:37 lafloor] I DID NOT SEE AN ERROR I TYPED IT WRONG IN MY EXCITEMENT BECAUSE I JUST WON
[00:37 lafloor] What the fuck?
[00:37 H3K] I am recording the move as White: N - K2 (which is 7e)
[00:37 lafloor] Both queens are in D file?
[00:38 lafloor] Oh this blows. I'm all fucked up.
[00:38 H3K] yes - they must face each other, as do the kings
[00:38 lafloor] Gimme a minute to sort this out, will you?
[00:38 guevara] Jes.
[00:38 H3K] There is a time-out on the field
[00:39 guevara] I have benefited from his inexperience.
[00:39 guevara] Does this make me guilty?
[00:39 lafloor] Oh fuck. I had the king and queen on hsi side reversed
[00:39 guevara] Mui no madre!
[00:39 H3K] sportsmanlike conduct would preclude you rubbing it in, Guevara
[00:40 guevara] But senor, she screamed at me when she thought I was finished!
[00:40 lafloor] He can rub it in! It's pretty funny!
[00:40 H3K] LaFloor, you may rectify the situation by locating his queen (on your board) at D1, and his King at F1
[00:41 H3K] (he has moved his king once)
[00:41 lafloor] Okay. Anhow. So since that's case, and since I chose to move my pawn, do you want it to be to 7 c or 7 e? I don't care.
[00:41 H3K] Oh wait... I'm osrry, that's you.
[00:41 H3K] Gorram algebraic
[00:41 lafloor] Yeah, that's me
[00:41 guevara] Si, I have never moved my king, senor.
[00:42 lafloor] So where is his king and queen?
[00:42 H3K] Neither his king or quen have moved yet. they are at D8 (queen) and E8 (king)
[00:42 lafloor] Your king is on 8e and your queen is on 8 d, correct?
[00:42 guevara] Have I captured the Knight with my queen, senor?
[00:42 H3K] correct
[00:42 lafloor] Okay. Well, I commited to that fucking knight
[00:43 H3K] that move has not been recorded yet. Reapeat it, please
[00:43 lafloor] Yes, you've captured the knight, but I don't know what square you got it form
[00:43 lafloor] Where is your queen after taking the horsey?
[00:43 guevara] c7
[00:43 lafloor] Dono: BOYO did I fuck up!!
[00:43 lafloor] Dono: I'll fix it. Really. Maybe I can fix it!
[00:44 guevara] Lay on, senor.
[00:44 H3K] WAIT!!!
[00:44 lafloor] HE SAID IT
[00:45 lafloor] DON'T YOU HELP HIM!
[00:45 H3K] I recorded white's last move as KNight to E7 -- which puts it in the square in front of your king.
[00:45 guevara] Aye yi yi, what now senor?
[00:45 lafloor] HIS QUEEN IS FUCKING TOAST
[00:45 guevara] Senor, replay the tape, I moved to c7
[00:45 lafloor] OH, alright!
[00:45 guevara] To take his horsey.
[00:45 lafloor] STEVE
[00:45 H3K] to take that knioght with your queen, that leaves her at E7, not C7
[00:45 lafloor] DO NOT FIGHT TO PUT YOUR QUEEN AT C7
[00:46 guevara] I was in check, senor. I had no other move.
[00:46 lafloor] We are all fucked up here
[00:46 H3K] NO, you were not
[00:46 lafloor] I'm just saying
[00:46 H3K] I was told the move was to e7 -- that did not put you in check
[00:46 lafloor] I don't want Steve thinking I screwed him here. Can I recap briefly?
[00:47 lafloor] Steve, I asked you, do you want me to move that knight to 7c or 7e?
[00:47 lafloor] And then you will take it with your queen.
[00:47 H3K] I am the refree, I will recap, by asking questions
[00:47 guevara] I thought your Knight was on C7
[00:47 guevara] Ok, I will hold.
[00:47 H3K] LaFloor, did you mean to take th pawn and put Guevara in check?
[00:48 lafloor] I meant to do that but I had it backward, and now I don't know what's fair to do here.
[00:48 lafloor] I'm really sorry.
[00:49 lafloor] I don't want to fuck over Don, but when I was confused...
[00:49 H3K] Or was you move to E7 based on your mistaken position of his king?
[00:49 lafloor] I FOUGHT to put that knight at 7e instead of 7c
[00:49 lafloor] YES! My move to 7e was based on my mistake, and that's MY fault
[00:49 lafloor] Now that I see it correctly, OF COURSE I'd want to go to 7c.
[00:50 H3K] Do I leave it as is?
[00:50 lafloor] But I don't think that's fair to do.
[00:50 lafloor] I don't know!
[00:50 H3K] OK -- I understand...
[00:50 H3K] The OFFICIAL RULING is as follows:
[00:50 lafloor] I screwed up, so you should call it as you see it.
[00:51 H3K] white: NxP @ C7 ch
[00:51 H3K] black: QxP @c7
[00:51 H3K] white's move
[00:52 lafloor] Is his queen now on C7?
[00:52 H3K] yes
[00:52 lafloor] and his king is on 8e?
[00:52 H3K] yes
[00:55 lafloor] Queen 1d - 4d
[00:56 H3K] An official time out is called -- please do not post moves until I return.
[00:56 H3K] damn...
[00:56 H3K] white: Q - Q4
[00:56 lafloor] Sorry I'm so dumb Steve (and Don, especially!)
[00:56 H3K] Time Out
[00:57 guevara] No problemo.
[00:57 guevara] This is your first time, you are killing me.
[00:57 guevara] I am humbled.
[00:57 lafloor] I'm not killing you! You got my horseys!
[00:57 lafloor] and a rook and a pawn!
[00:58 lafloor] I am dying a slow, cold death
[00:58 lafloor] but I'll fuck you up somehow
[00:58 guevara] Jes.
[00:58 guevara] But you are still on the offensive.
[00:58 lafloor] Can I ask you a question?
[00:58 lafloor] Where is my remaining rook?
[00:58 guevara] Shoot.
[00:58 guevara] h1
[00:58 lafloor] okay
[00:59 guevara] 1h
[00:59 lafloor] Can I ask another question?
[00:59 guevara] shoot
[01:00 lafloor] forget it.
[01:00 lafloor] I'm developing a strategy now
[01:01 guevara] ra8-d8
[01:02 H3K] The Ref has returned -- Guevara is that your move?
[01:02 guevara] or to be more clear
[01:02 guevara] yes
[01:02 H3K] recorded: black: R - Q1
[01:02 guevara] Rook a8-d8
[01:03 H3K] the polite chess thing to sat is "guardez" -- i.e., white's queen should watch her ass
[01:04 lafloor] Queen 4d-4e
[01:04 guevara] En guardez, madam!
[01:04 lafloor] Now you're just pissing me off!
[01:04 H3K] white: Q - K4
[01:05 guevara] Bishop h7x4e
[01:05 lafloor] FUCK
[01:06 guevara]
[01:06 lafloor] bishop 2g-4e
[01:06 H3K] black: BxQ @ E4
[01:06 H3K] ou missed a better move, Guevara
[01:07 H3K] white: BxB @ E4
[01:07 guevara] Damn you hal, I'm not a computer.
[01:07 guevara] Touche, Guy.
[01:07 H3K] neither am I, IRL
[01:08 guevara] Queen 7cx5c
[01:09 H3K] but... you had checkmate in one move, just so you know
[01:09 guevara] I love that show, My Name is IRL.
[01:09 guevara] Now who's rubbing it in?
[01:09 H3K] black: QxP @C5
[01:10 guevara] Sir, you have my permission to pull Hal's cord bundle.
[01:10 lafloor] I don't understand that move. Don't you have a pawn on 6C?
[01:10 guevara] No pawn on 6c, not on my board.
[01:11 H3K] no, you took that in the porcess of repaifing the earlier fuckup
[01:11 lafloor] a pawn on 6C?
[01:11 H3K] it's white's move (black to mate in 1)
[01:11 lafloor] I took that?
[01:12 H3K] you did -- and it was on c7, not c6
[01:13 lafloor] king 1e - 1f
[01:14 H3K] your king is already on 1F
[01:14 guevara] I have your king on 1f right now, senor.
[01:14 lafloor] Yeah, I fucking lost, I know
[01:15 lafloor] go ahead, play it out, Greek Salad eater
[01:15 guevara] Do you concede senor?
[01:15 lafloor] No, I don't concede. Just play it out.
[01:15 guevara] Do not spit in my Greek Salad, senor. I become ill very easily.
[01:16 guevara] But your move is false, senor.
[01:16 guevara] Your king was already on f1, no?
[01:16 lafloor] I spit ice chips in your Greek salad, senor.
[01:16 lafloor] My king was already on f1?
[01:16 H3K] It is still your move, White
[01:17 H3K] Yes, your king currently resides @ F1
[01:17 guevara] Si, that is what we have been telling you.
[01:18 guevara] Do I have to whip out the Kobiashi Maru on your ass?
[01:18 H3K] That is a Starfleet maneouver, not a chess gambit
[01:18 lafloor] then I move my pawn 2e to 3e
[01:18 lafloor] kobiashu maru Keyser Soze this, Guevara!
[01:19 H3K] excellent choice -- white: P - K3
[01:19 guevara] Very well.
[01:19 H3K] no longer mate in 1, black... your move
[01:20 guevara] You had me all excited, you damn machine!
[01:21 H3K] You could ahve ended this three moves ago, but you had to get greedy for a queen...
[01:21 guevara] Queen c5xc1
[01:21 guevara] Check
[01:21 H3K] black: QxB @ C1
[01:21 H3K] check
[01:22 lafloor] King 1f - 2g
[01:23 H3K] white: K - KN2
[01:24 guevara] Ng4xf2
[01:25 guevara] Wait!
[01:25 guevara] Too late. MY bad.
[01:25 guevara] My queen is gone.
[01:25 lafloor] rook 1h - 1e
[01:25 lafloor] er, 1c
[01:26 H3K] black: NxP @ F2
[01:26 guevara] Si.
[01:26 H3K] white: RxQ @ C1
[01:27 guevara] Knight f2xf4
[01:28 H3K] you take the bishop? that's e4
[01:28 guevara] Errr, I meanE4
[01:28 H3K] black: NxB @ E4
[01:28 guevara] I am making mui mui mistakes! Aye yi yi!
[01:29 lafloor] I WANTED THAT BISHOP, GUEVARA!
[01:29 lafloor] You are really making this difficult!
[01:29 guevara] I wanted that Queen, madone!
[01:29 Dono] lafloor:
[01:29 H3K] It is the opinion of the referee tht white should consider resigning.
[01:29 H3K] It is the opinion of the referee tht white should consider resigning.
[01:30 guevara] My queen, which I sacrificed like a maricone!
[01:30 H3K] This is, btw, no reflection on the captial for which this game is played.
[01:30 lafloor] rook 1c to 7c
[01:31 H3K] white: R - QB7
[01:31 H3K] (isn't that a Leon Uris novel?)
[01:31 lafloor] You know Don, I'd have still gotten my ass kicked, but it really didn't help IN BLOOM that I set up the freaking chess board wrong
[01:31 guevara] Hold on, you. I'm thinking!
[01:32 guevara] Rookd8-d2 Check
[01:32 Dono] lafloor: that actually might have helped you
[01:32 lafloor] I apologize for that, and I'd like to apologize to the ref and Guevara for my confusion in this.
[01:33 guevara] Without your mistake, I'd have already been beaten, senor.
[01:33 H3K] No aplogoes needed to me -- we got it straightened out
[01:33 H3K] black: R - Q7 ch
[01:34 lafloor] king 2g - 3h
[01:35 H3K] white: K - KR3
[01:35 Dono] lafloor: it aint over till its over, lafloor!
[01:35 guevara] N e4-g2 check
[01:36 H3K] that
[01:36 H3K] s f2
[01:36 H3K] black: N - KB7 ch
[01:40 lafloor] king 3h - 2g
[01:41 H3K] white: K - KN2
[01:41 guevara] N g2-f4
[01:41 guevara] check
[01:42 H3K] black: N - K5 ch
[01:43 lafloor] I thought your knight was on f2?
[01:43 H3K] btw, black, your knight was on f2 before, it's now on e4
[01:44 lafloor] his knight is now on e4?
[01:44 guevara] Sorry. f2-34
[01:44 guevara] is what I meant
[01:44 guevara] Err, I mean e4
[01:44 H3K] no problemo
[01:44 lafloor] king 2g - 3f
[01:44 guevara] Too many cervasas.
[01:45 H3K] white: K - KB3
[01:46 guevara] king e1-d1
[01:46 H3K] black: K - Q1
[01:47 lafloor] 8e - 8 d, that is, right?
[01:48 guevara] Err, that's right. Again. Sorry.
[01:48 H3K] yes
[01:48 H3K] tough reading upside down, eh?
[01:48 guevara] King e8-d8
[01:48 guevara] Si.
[01:50 lafloor] king 3fx4e
[01:51 H3K] good for you! white: KxN @E4
[01:51 guevara] King 8dx7c
[01:52 H3K] black: KxR @ C7
[01:52 guevara] It's a battle of nutrition.
[01:52 H3K] And your'e both starving
[01:53 guevara] Jes.
[01:53 Dono] lafloor: Go Lafloor!
[01:53 guevara] I will be your straight man. Do you work here often?
[01:53 lafloor] king 3g x 4g
[01:53 lafloor] that was wrong
[01:53 lafloor] I meant pawn 3g - 4g
[01:54 guevara] Si.
[01:54 H3K] that's better... white: P - KN4
[01:54 guevara] Pawn h5xg4
[01:55 lafloor] oops!
[01:55 guevara] When do I whip out my en passant on his ass?
[01:55 H3K] black: PXP @ g4
[01:56 guevara] I want my queen back, suckah!
[01:56 lafloor] pawn 4a - 5a
[01:56 lafloor] you're gonna get her
[01:56 H3K] white: P - QR5
[01:57 guevara] pawn g4-g3
[01:57 H3K] black: P - KN6
[01:58 lafloor] king 4e - 3f
[01:58 lafloor] oh fuck
[01:58 lafloor] didn't see that!
[01:59 H3K] white: K - KB3
[01:59 guevara] pawn g3-g2
[01:59 H3K] The referee calls time
[01:59 guevara] My queen, I shall not forsake ye!
[01:59 lafloor] then I'm going too
[02:00 guevara] Wherefore Dono?
[02:01 guevara] Queen me, baby!
[02:01 Dono] lafloor: still here
[02:01 guevara] I mean, bambino!
[02:02 guevara] Dono, it has been a bitter fight.
[02:02 guevara] Truly, thank you for attending this grudge match.
[02:02 Dono] lafloor: my pleasure
[02:04 guevara] As Hal said before it all started, it's a farce. I don't know if we proved anything by this except keeping you and the others up past their bed time. But, ya know. You try new ways of doing things. Win some, lose some.
[02:04 guevara] I hope you will submit something next quarter.
[02:04 lafloor] i'm back
[02:05 lafloor] if he does, give him a better chess player at least
[02:05 H3K] So am I
[02:05 guevara] Undale!
[02:05 H3K] You need spanish lessons, Senor
[02:05 guevara] or is it Andale?
[02:05 lafloor] I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to do anymore.
[02:06 Dono] lafloor: thanks for playing in my honor lafloor!
[02:06 guevara] My Spanish is untrustworthy ever since I moved to Albuquerque.
[02:06 lafloor] I guess I'm move my king back to 4e
[02:06 H3K] it's black's move
[02:06 guevara] Queen me baby!
[02:06 guevara] g1
[02:07 H3K] Oh, wait -- my mistake. He took it as I was calling time
[02:07 guevara] Lafloor moved king 4e.
[02:07 guevara] I have been queened.]
[02:08 H3K] so: black" P - g2; white K - e4; black P- G1 and it turns gay
[02:08 lafloor] it's cool. I moved my king to 3e, he got queened, so I guess it's back to me again
[02:08 H3K] White's move
[02:08 H3K] Your king is on e4
[02:09 guevara] Si, e4
[02:09 lafloor] king to 5e
[02:09 guevara] That is moving into check, senor.
[02:09 H3K] white: K - K5
[02:09 H3K] no it's not
[02:09 guevara] You can no do that.
[02:10 H3K] that is, it's not check
[02:10 lafloor] from where am I getting checked?
[02:10 lafloor] oh, it's not check
[02:10 lafloor] but it will be in about two moves!
[02:10 guevara] So that pawn I have there on e3 is not there?
[02:10 guevara] err, e6
[02:11 lafloor] you have a pawn on 6e
[02:11 H3K] youe mean e6, but it doesn't threaten the king at e5
[02:11 guevara] I mean. Shall I pull it from the board?
[02:11 H3K] No, it's postion is correct -- your surmise is not
[02:11 lafloor] no, it's there, but why is that check?
[02:11 guevara] OK.
[02:11 guevara] My wrong
[02:11 lafloor] Can't pawns only take a piece on the diagonal?
[02:12 H3K] It'sn ot check -- pawns check as they capture, on the diagonal
[02:12 lafloor] oh. I fear I should have castled long ago. Is it too late to go back and do so?
[02:12 H3K] waaaaaaaaaay too late
[02:12 lafloor] oh. shucks
[02:12 guevara] Rook d2-d5 check
[02:13 H3K] black: R - Q3 ch
[02:14 lafloor] king to 5e
[02:14 H3K] You're on 5e
[02:14 H3K] you mean 4e?
[02:15 lafloor] i meant 4f
[02:15 lafloor] it's um, it's 2 am here. pardon my punchiness
[02:15 guevara] Si. Got it.
[02:16 H3K] OK -- white: K - KB4
[02:16 guevara] Queen 1g-2h check
[02:17 H3K] yes -- Q - KR2 ch
[02:18 lafloor] king to 4e
[02:19 H3K] white: K - K4
[02:19 lafloor] you've got me now I think
[02:20 lafloor] do you have me now?
[02:20 guevara] Pawnf2-f4 check
[02:21 guevara] Probably, I am not very good, though.
[02:21 H3K] black: P - KN4 ch
[02:21 lafloor] I don't know what you just did, are you upside down again?
[02:22 H3K] oops - KB4
[02:22 guevara] Yes. Pawn f7-f5
[02:22 H3K] yes, he's upside down
[02:23 lafloor] king to f3
[02:23 H3K] you have only one move, white
[02:23 H3K] K to f3
[02:24 H3K] done
[02:24 lafloor] i just did that
[02:24 H3K] I see (gorram lag in this chat)
[02:25 guevara] Rook f8-h8
[02:25 H3K] black: R - R1
[02:26 guevara] Tis a cruel game.
[02:26 lafloor] pawn 3e - 4e
[02:27 H3K] good choice -- white: P - K4
[02:27 guevara] Pawn 5fx4e
[02:27 guevara] Check
[02:28 lafloor] yes, 'tis. Well played Guevara. *spit* Very well played. I have respect for your chess moves -- if not for your choice in blowing off IN BLOOM!
[02:28 H3K] PxP @ E4 - check
[02:28 guevara] This way, IN BLOOM had a sporting chacne, senor.
[02:28 lafloor] king 3fx4e
[02:28 guevara] I almost lost this with such boneheaded moves as I made.
[02:29 guevara] Going down fighting!
[02:29 H3K] to quote Cobain: "oh well, whatever, never mind"
[02:29 H3K] white KxP @4e
[02:29 guevara] Rook h8xh4 check
[02:30 deplancher] has joined the room.
[02:30 lafloor] I would love to take your lousy rook!
[02:30 lafloor] But, alas.
[02:30 guevara] You are surrounded, senor.
[02:30 lafloor] I know one thing I've learned from this -- if I ever had any interest in chess, it's long gone!
[02:30 H3K] Gaby!
[02:31 deplancher] Bonjour!
[02:31 guevara] You have come to witness the coup de grace, mademoiselle.[02:31 lafloor] pawn 5ax6b
[02:31 deplancher] You need another witness, I heard the scream.
[02:31 guevara] Bonjour!
[02:32 H3K] don't kid yourself -- there's no grace in this coup
[02:32 guevara] NO grace, true, but coup.
[02:32 deplancher] I will be back. My hands are cold here. Knock it down!
[02:32 H3K] Um, guy -- there's nothing at 6b for your pawn to capture
[02:33 guevara] Queen 2g-2e check mate?
[02:33 lafloor] there isn't?
[02:33 H3K] no there isn't -- he never moved either of the pawns on that end
[02:34 H3K] Hang on, Guevara -- LaFloor still needs to move
[02:34 guevara] OK.
[02:34 guevara] I have re-set my queen, then.
[02:34 H3K] it wasn't mate anyway
[02:36 lafloor] I need to move? But it's illegal for me to take your rook, right?
[02:36 H3K] M'sieu LaFloor, we still await your move
[02:36 guevara] On my board, yes. It was.
[02:36 lafloor] so I go to 3e
[02:36 H3K] since the one you gave isn't possible
[02:36 H3K] OK
[02:36 H3K] white: K - K3
[02:37 H3K] now you, black
[02:37 guevara] Knight a1-c2 check mate?
[02:37 lafloor] roaring exciting stuff, huh gabby?
[02:38 H3K] um, you're right, it was... I'm tired too
[02:38 guevara] Si, even computers tire. Nada problemo.
[02:38 H3K] black: N - QB2 check....
[02:38 lafloor] 3e - 5e
[02:38 deplancher] has joined the room.
[02:38 guevara] CHECK MATE!
[02:39 guevara] lafloor: i MUST BREAK YOU.
[02:39 H3K] not mate -- white has a move
[02:39 deplancher] There is nothing so exciting as the little chess board.
[02:39 H3K] e3 - f3
[02:40 guevara] mY QUEEN IS NOT ON G2?
[02:40 H3K] white: K - KB3
[02:40 guevara] Sorry, caps lock.
[02:40 lafloor] his queen is on g2, it's checkmate
[02:41 H3K] f3 is an unthreatened square
[02:41 guevara] Gracias.
[02:41 guevara] G2 Queen takes f3 king
[02:41 H3K] queens do not check as knight's do
[02:41 lafloor] I don't understand that. I believe it's checkmate, because his queen is on g2
[02:41 deplancher] who controls the centre, Hal?
[02:42 H3K] Wait... on my voard, your queen is at H2!!!
[02:42 H3K] I must scroll back
[02:42 lafloor] his queen is on g2
[02:42 guevara] Correct, sir. Sir. G2
[02:42 guevara] You may have missed a move.
[02:43 lafloor] you still suck, Guevara!
[02:43 lafloor] But well, played!
[02:43 guevara] Si, si. It was an ugly match.
[02:43 guevara] No beautiful games here.
[02:43 lafloor] Yeah, ugly cause I coulnd't figure out the fucking pieces.
[02:43 guevara] Thank you. Hal, you did a fantastic job keeping things straight.
[02:43 lafloor] Thanks for the patience with it.
[02:43 guevara] All until that last g2 incident.
[02:43 lafloor] Thanks for giving In Bloom the extra shot
[02:44 guevara] Thanks everyone
[02:44 lafloor] Yeah! Well, by then there aren't many squares left
[02:44 deplancher] Dono has gone. Was that the VC?
[02:44 guevara] For this is a stunt. and I hope some good writing comes of it on the site.
[02:44 lafloor] Sorry Don >
[02:44 lafloor] In Bloom deserved a better champion.
[02:44 guevara] Yes, DeP.
[02:44 guevara] He was cheering on Guy.
[02:45 deplancher] Ok. Wish I would have dropped over earlier.
[02:45 lafloor] Okay, then I'm going too, is that alright? It's nearly 3 here
[02:45 H3K] Well, I can't scroll back, because no one will remain quite long enough -- this chat SUX!!!
[02:45 deplancher] Was it a succeth?
[02:45 lafloor] Again, well played Steve, I'm impressed!
[02:45 guevara] H3K, please write a scathing review of my idiot play. It will chasten me as I should be chastened.
[02:45 lafloor] Thanks for the shot.
[02:45 deplancher] Yike. G'night, Guy.
[02:45 lafloor] Scathe me and I'll kick your fucking ass.
[02:45 lafloor] Just saying.
[02:45 deplancher] Well put.
[02:45 lafloor] G'night.
[02:46 H3K] Gaby, how in hell do you transcribe these things???
[02:46 guevara] Good night. Thanks, Guy.
[02:46 guevara] Copy and paste.
[02:46 H3K] Gnight, Guy
[02:46 guevara] I can do it, Hal. No problemo.
[02:46 deplancher] I copied and pasted throughout.
[02:47 H3K] I got it, finally
[02:47 guevara] Sorry you just got here and it's all over, DeP.
[02:47 guevara] Well have another Rorschalk Group soon.
[02:47 H3K] [02:16 guevara] Queen 1g-2h check
[02:47 guevara] OK, Hal.
[02:47 deplancher] It's alright. I didn't know it was happening tonight...until I checked in. Oh well.
[02:48 H3K] Your queen was on 2H, gorramit
[02:48 guevara] No, it couldn't have been!
[02:48 deplancher] What! It wasn't over??
[02:48 H3K] on the other hand, you could have checkmated with the rook rather than taking the queen, hours ago...
[02:49 H3K] It was, and it still is on my board.
[02:49 deplancher] This will make great copy. And controversy.
[02:49 H3K] I just copied out of this chat
[02:50 guevara] Herm.
[02:50 H3K] For that, I think "In Bloom" should go up (even though I didn't like it)
[02:50 guevara] Yeah, I'm not a real good player, player.
[02:50 deplancher] Guy is not sleeping yet. But the Don man has fled.
[02:50 guevara] Fine!
[02:50 guevara] IN Bloom goes up.
[02:50 deplancher] 'Cap is redeemed...'
[02:51 guevara] Fair is fair.
[02:51 guevara] Hal, you said you copied this chat already, or were you just checking the moves?
[02:51 H3K] When you and I play, Guevara, it's ging to be online interactive, where the server controls the board (for instance, Yahoo)
[02:52 H3K] I can recopy to include the fatal discovery
[02:52 H3K] and I will
[02:52 guevara] Hal, it won't matter. It will be 10 minutes, tops.
[02:52 guevara] I will concede my chess retardedness.
[02:53 guevara] now!
[02:53 H3K] maybe so -- but there won't be any question about where the pieces are
[02:53 guevara] It's been years since I played.
[02:53 guevara] And it shows.
[02:53 deplancher] Did this work out though? The chess thing. You have been here for 4 hours?
[02:54 guevara] I wonder how my queen got on g2, though?
[02:54 guevara] That is a puzzlement.
[02:54 guevara] Yes, a battle of attrition, it was.
[02:54 H3K] anyway -- it's pushing 2 in the godawful morning here. I'm going to recopy to this point, and log off
[02:54 guevara] Bad play all around.
[02:54 H3K] you moved it there dummkopf
[02:54 deplancher] has joined the room.
[02:55 guevara] Good night, Hal. You really did a great job. Thank you.
[02:55 guevara] It would have been a mess without you.
[02:55 H3K] Goodnight, all
[02:55 guevara] Night.
[02:55 deplancher] G'night. Sweet dream wherever you are..
[02:56 guevara] Hey DeP. I better go too. Good night.
[02:56 guevara] I hope you are well.
posted by Theodore Q. Rorschalk at 3:01 PM
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